Week 9 Predictions

Well, it is Wednesday night and I just got done taking my kids trick or treating. We get back and we make our candy trades and then we put the kids to bed. After that, we do what every parent does... peruse their candy and take what we want. In a way some fantasy team owners can look at a fantasy league and play it out just like Halloween...

1. Let the other managers do the work (the draft/waiver wire)
2. Let them make a few trades (early weeks - you can also find some gold here)
3. Peruse their candy and take what you want (find out what your roster needs and get it)

One example would be playing a certain long game. Now, don't get me wrong - your team needs to reach certain standards first. Luckily, my team is 7-1 and should make the playoffs. So at this point I need to find out what it is that my team is going to need for the playoffs - while at the same time is also a position that many owners would cast-off as something that is not needed - Defense. So, I perused the teams and found a defense that I believe to have a very comfy matchup in the first two weeks of the post season - Detroit Lions. The Lions face Arizona and Buffalo in week 14 and 15 - how about that!?! I would say I have just taken a nice fun size Snickers! Am I crazy for playing the long game and caring this much? You bet your sweet ass I am. But hey, I haven't won the league yet and there is a spot in my classroom that this trophy would look really good!

Col. Erran Morad (1-7) v Mike McCarthy is Gay (2-6)

This is a matchup between two teams that face a must win situation. Neither team is mathematically eliminated from the playoffs - but a loss this week would be fatal to their season.

Not to worry about Col. Morad and his decision to currently have Winston at quarterback - Big Ben is on his bench. The bigger issue he will face is replacing Clement - as his only running back on the bench is Mike Davis. At least he has a defense that could score 30 points against Nathan Peterman.... "Hey Peterman, check out channel nine - it's the breast exams, Whoo!"

MMIG finds themselves in a must win situation with his team looking ready for this week. Brady is going to shine this week, he doesn't want to be outdone by Rodgers in their matchup of "The GOATS." Thielen is incredibly impressive and Edelman is getting acquainted with Brady fairly quickly. Look for Brady and the receivers to lead MMIG to victory this week.

Prediction: Mike McCarthy is Gay wins

Sagging TD's (1-7) v The J-Bones (3-5)

I would first like to applaud Sagging TD's for fielding a full roster this week - once again, I am going to give him the benefit of the doubt that there were other pressing issues. Once again, both these teams need a win this week....

Marvin Jones Jr. gets a huge bump after Detroit traded away Golden Tate. I also like Drew Brees this week - he is going to want to have a huge game at home against the LA Rams. This matchup is a possibly NFC Championship matchup and he will want to make sure he leaves a lasting memory in the Rams minds.

The J-Bones will be leaning heavily on their running back corps. Conner and Coleman give him a great one-two punch. He is going to need to figure who to replace Mack (FLEX), which will be a big lost - Mack has been playing amazingly the past couple weeks. Keenan Allen needs to have a big week, especially because he is coming off of a bye week. I like this roster and his matchups much more than Sagging TD's - as long as he can find a suitable replacement at the FLEX position.

Prediction: The J-Bones wins

Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood (5-3) v Prible is my B*tch (4-4)

Mr. Rodgers is one of the teams that is fighting for a top seed and he needs to win this week if he still wants to be in the chase. PIMB doesn't need to win this week, but if he wants to add a little distance between him and the cutline then a win would be fantastic!

There are rumblings coming out of Detroit that they want to run the ball. Kerryon Johnson is the running back they are committing to - which gives Mr. Rodgers three starting running backs. James White has to be one of the best valued back this season - he was drafted in the 6th round and then traded for (Halloween candy style). Goodwin and Breida have a Thursday night game - which is not a good sign for an offense that is already struggling. However, let's not forget what DeSean Jackson did in the first four weeks when FitzMagic was the quarterback - averaged just under 20 points per game.

PIMB is one of the teams that needs to be feared. Jones, OBJ, and Boyd all make-up one of the best receiving corps in the league. Luckily for Mr. Rodgers, OBJ and Boyd are both on a bye week. Lindsay and Peterson both had great weeks last week - PIMB is hoping that trend continues. However, Peterson needed a huge run at the end of the game to really supply his terrific week. My bet - one of them hits big again this week - but will it be enough? Nope.

Prediction: Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood wins

UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins (3-5) v Team Dez Nuts (2-6)

I am constantly confused at how some of these teams lose - whether it be bad luck or just poor performances. Both of these teams represent a couple of those teams.

Elliott is one the best running backs in the NFL - which in turn makes him one of the best running backs in Fantasy Football. Rodgers getting hurt, also hurt SucItAtkins, but he still performing at a high level. Sanders will see far less of bump (with the trade of D. Thomas) - now more teams will be able to double team Sanders - but Sanders will still turn in a decent performance. Rudolph is a decent tight end - that should see multiple targets.

On the flip side, Smith-Shuster should have a good week with the Steelers offense really beginning to click. Kelce is as Dennis Green said, "He is who is - and we let him get away!" Cleveland will have no answer for Kelce - who is one of the most difficult players to match-up with. The Dallas defense has one of the best matchups this week, there is not much going well on offense for Tennessee. I like this team - but every time I pick them to win, they lose - so this is my gift to Dez Nuts...

Prediction: UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins wins

Hernandez Hit Men (7-1) v The Trashmen (4-4)

If Hernandez Hit Men were a real NFL team - I would not want to play against them this week. When a good team gets beat, they look to take it out against their next opponent. Look for this to happen...

McCaffrey, Landry, Chubb, and Mahomes all find themselves in matchups that should result in shootouts - three of them in the same game. Gordon is a freak in his own right and it doesn't matter what matchup he is. That means there are five position players that should score very well this week - a dangerous combination to go against.

The Trashmen, which may as well be called the Thursday Night Gang, always seem to have players going on Thursday Night. He will need Richard to have a big week - since he will be relying on Adams to have a huge week. He can't really be super confident in Blount and Montgomery, but hey people do crazy things!

Prediction: Hernandez Hit Men

I AM STUPID (4-4) v Steady Diet (8-0)

With Hernandez Hit Men losing last week - Steady Diet remains the only unbeaten team in the league.

Newton has a fantastic matchup. Kamara is a freak beast. Hill has a fantastic matchup. After that? Steady Diet find themselves vulnerable, very vulnerable. Ekeler, Beasley, Clay, Funchess - all need to have decent games to provide the support needed to remain undefeated.

STUPID boosts a fantastic group of wide receivers - Thomas, Diggs, and Golladay. Golladay is one the biggest beneficiaries from the trade deadline and Detroit trading away Golden Tate. Not only does STUPID have a fantastic group of receivers but his roster also has two starting running backs - Drake and McCoy. McCoy is some that is a little "shady" (see what I did there) with his performances. However, Drake can be a big factor down the road - the past two weeks he has gone for almost 200 yards from scrimmage and 3 total touchdowns.

If Steady Diet cannot get the support that is needed - this could be the end of our undefeated teams...

Prediction: I AM STUPID wins

Matchup of the Week

White Condomints (7-1) v Hoosier Daddy (5-3)

Both of these teams are 2nd place in their respective division and both are attempting to overtake first - not necessarily this week, but possibly in the upcoming weeks. In order for this to happen, a win is a must here...

QB - Prescott v Wilson
Both these quarterbacks are virtually the same type of quarterback - Wilson has a slightly better arm than Prescott, but Prescott has a few better weapons to spread the ball around. The slight edge would have to go to Wilson, Seattle loves to let Wilson be the playmaker and Dallas will rely a little more on their All-Pro running back. Advantage Wilson.

RB - Hunt/Ingram v Gurley/Jones
Gurley is the best running back in football and it is not even close. In the order of ranking for these four running backs...

1. Gurley
2. Gurley
3. Gurley
4. Hunt, Ingram, Jones

Advantage Gurley/Jones

WR - Hopkins/Brown v Evans/Sutton
As much as Golladay benefitted from Tate being traded; Sutton benefitted from Demaryius Thomas being traded. However, even with Sutton's bump and Mike Evans getting FitzMagic back at quarterback - there is still no denying the fact that Hopkins and Brown are THE BEST wide receiver tandem in this league. Advantage Hopkins/Brown

TE - Kittle/Olsen
Both of these tight ends are very similar - heavily targeted receivers that are in an offense that would prefer to run the ball. However, they are - as stated - heavily targeted. Kittle plays on Thursday night and Olsen has a matchup with Tampa Bay. Advantage Olsen

FLEX - Cohen v Gordon
Tarik Cohen is one the key players in Chicago's newly explosive offense. Technically speaking, Cohen is a running back. However, Cohen pretty lines up all over the field. Gordon is a freak athlete in an offense with Tom Brady at quarterback. Cohen has an edge - but only a slight edge.

DEF/K - Patriots/Butker v Broncos/Fairbairn
First, let me state that I am looking forward to the Sunday Night Game. I can assume it is going to be a letdown - because how can a game hyped up as "The Battle of the GOATS" actually live up to that? Either way, I do expect fireworks from both offenses. With that being said, the Patriots defense is not a smart play - but the only option for White Condomints is a Lions defense that faces the Minnesota. Looks like the advantage goes to Broncos/Fairbairn.

Just too many advantages on Hoosier Daddy's side...

Prediction: Hoosier Daddy wins

Mwah

Week 8 Results

I am going to be honest, I have missed this. I feel like it has been an eternity since I was able to verbally assault all of my friends and their poor decisions in fantasy football. As one buddy is known to say...

"Fantasy Football will determine who you are as a man."

And I think that he is entirely correct. I was talking with a student the other day and the conversation turned down a path I really didn't want to go: him and how he has no friends. First off, don't waste my time with your problems - HAH, I have other things that need to be tended to. Secondly, he stated that he has no friends because all they do is make fun of each other. This boy is struggle in a man's world if he is looking for anything else - THIS IS WHAT WE DO!! And to be clear, by we I am referring to men. I make fun of my closest of friends - because that is how we get along. If you can't handle that - you might as well join Caitlyn J. and the other side - which don't get me started on that thin skinned piece of...

Okay, anyway - on to the results!

White Condomints (7-1) v Hernandez Hit Men (7-1)

Remember when I said I missed this? Yeah, my ass was on a cruise in the middle of the ocean - rough life I know! However, it also meant I was without internet and I could not take out Keke Coutee. Luckily, HHM was also without Gordon (he was at least able to replace him).

This was a battle of two teams that could see each other in the playoffs - maybe for the 'ship! Brown and Hopkins are unreal and with a nicely rounded out squad after that - White Condomints is a team that is looking take the regular season and the playoffs. This was a statement win, and if I was able to do the predictions - this would have been the clear favorite for Matchup of the Week.

HHM had his studs play well (Mahomes and McCaffrey), but everybody else after that was so-so. Nelson is a surprising no show, not the he has been lights-out - but rather he was going against the Colts defense and the Raiders just traded Amari Cooper. HHM shouldn't really be worried about making the playoffs - however they do drop off the undefeated train and then there was one!

Steady Diet (8-0) v Col. Erran Morad (1-7)

This comfy win could not have come at a better time than this week for our beloved football coach. I mean, can we all just give it up for Col. Erran Morad by just letting coach win so that he could focus on the big game this week. Hip, Hip...

Oh, wait a second - I just received word that Col. Morad did let him win - his team is just actually that bad. He was actually trying to win and scored that few of points?!? Well, this is a awkward....

Yes, like I was saying this an extremely comfy win. A win that pushes Steady Diet to the top of the league and now shifts the balance of power and the title of "Team to Beat" to Steady Diet. With strong performances from Newton, Kamara, and Mixon - no one else needed to play and SD would have still won - Steady Diet will be our last remaining undefeated team.

Col. Morad, the only redeeming value in your team (manhood) is that there are just so many injuries on your roster that you can at least blame that. Fournette being out definitely does not help in anyway. Either does A. Robinson - both of which would be automatic starters on your team. Luckily, this week it did not matter as you ran into a team that is handing out beatdowns left and right (trust I took mine in week 1).

Mike McCarthy is Gay (2-6) v Sagging TD's (1-7)

This was a battle for the ages! Okay, I am going to be honest - I don't know what to do. Sagging TD's this is the second time you have played guys were out or on a bye and lost. And you could have easily won this matchup - you had Carson and Crowell on the bench. I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt and say that you are still attempting to win games and not giving up. But you are making it hard on the commissioner to back you up. I know your team is bad - I sympathize with you. But, you could have won!!

MMIG - you better thank your lucky stars that something was preoccupying Sagging TD's.

The J-Bones (3-5) v Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood (5-3)

Does anybody remember my anecdote about how someone had to drive to my house in order to get me to push a trade through before week 1? Does anybody remember the players swapped in that trade?

J-Bones receive James Conner
Col. Erran Morad receive Jimmy Graham

While Jimmy Graham is one of the most enjoyable names to yell when something good happens, he is the 12th best tight end, averaging 10.1 points a week. James Conner just happens to be the 4th best running back and is averaging 25.6 points a week. Sounds like this might a candidate for "Swindle of the Year."

The running back department is the saving grace of The J-Bones. Conner, Smallwood, and Mack all make up and well rounded group that has the superstar potential balanced with steady play. And to think, the only player drafted by The J-Bones of those three was Marlon Mack - drafted in the 8th round. Talk about working the trading block and waiver wire!

Mr. Rodgers, I think we are all thinking the same thing - what happened Njoku and Hilton? Other than that, a pretty good performance for everyone else. IF they would have reached their projections - this matchup would have gone the other way and allowed for more trash talking from the great one. Unfortunately, it did not.

Prible is my B*tch (4-4) v UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins (3-5)

PIMB is one of the teams that I would not want to meet in the playoffs. They just scored 140 points with -4 points from their defense and arguably their top player on the bye. The superstar power on this roster is unbelievable - when at full strength - Julio, OBJ, Peterson, Watson (all guys could score in the high 20's in any given week). If Dalvin Cook ever comes back, Murray's production will take a big hit - but I still would not want to face this team in the playoffs.

UrBlogIsWeak.... what's it like being Grau's b*tch?

Team Dez Nuts (2-6) v Hoosier Daddy (5-3)

Hoosier Daddy is another team that I would want to stay away from - very far away from. Gurley is ridiculously good. Evans is going to get better if the Buccs do what is right and stay with FitzMagic. Duke should begin to get more reps with the changing of the guard in Cleveland and no Hyde in the backfield. Not to mention, Wilson was the number two player in all of Fantasy Football last year. Yeah, not a team I want to face.

Dez Nuts, I don't know what to tell you. Your team roster looks good. Kelce, Luck, and Smith-Schuster are all great players (and could finish as All-Pros). Lockett is a sneaky player and Miller is looking better each week. I don't know what to tell you, I just don't.

The Trashmen (4-4) v I AM STUPID (4-4)

This was a needed win for STUPID, and one that could have really helped Trashmen solidify their ranking in the league. Diggs had a great game and Goff looked fantastic. Drake is finally waking up and if he follows last year's trend he could be dangerous in the back half of the season. The fact that Thomas was outscored by four other players on your roster is good sign of things to come!

There is a lot of consistency on The Trashmen's roster - just no star power. In this league, you need star power in order to win. Adams can supply it every so often - but after that it is just consistency across the board. Which is funny, if you just give a one point bump to every player - The Trashmen win this matchup. So, I guess you are just consistently not good enough?

Look forward to the predictions next week, where my mystery competitor and I continue our battle!

Mwah

Hump Week Predictions

Hey guys, guys what time it is!! IT IS HUMP WEEK!!

Our fantasy regular season consists of 13 weeks, this is week seven - HUMP WEEK!!

The push for the playoffs begin after this week - with a few teams nearing the brink of elimination. There is no better time in sports that a good playoff push and lots of scenarios that unfold. I am getting excited just thinking about it.....

Let's see who is going to be needing a win after this week....

I AM STUPID (3-3) v White Condomints (5-1)

A match-up between the YouTube channel co-founders? I think I like the sound of that!

If Dak has the same performance he had last week, this matchup will be an easy win for White Condomints. Ingram and Hunt are both great running backs - but the loss of A. Brown to the bye week is a tough void to fill. White Condomints is forced to go with two Texans wide receivers (Hopkins and Coutee) against a very good Jaguars secondary. It is going to be tough to compete with STUPID's wide receivers.

STUPID turned to the trading block and just recently acquired McCoy - who needs to turn back the clock and take advantage of his matchup against Indianapolis this week. Okay, quick question.... How many of you knew that David Johnson is currently the 10th ranked running back? I am extremely surprised! Honestly, I am more surprised that this lineup placed 2nd all-time in the lowest points per week. This looks like a lineup that could win a championship - or at least finish runner-up to White Condomints!

Prediction: White Condomints wins!!

The Trashmen (3-3) v Team Dez Nuts (2-4)

Do not let the bye weeks fool you - these players will be replaced, especially after last week's fiasco with Sagging TD's. How good the replacements will be is the question - currently Theo Riddick is the only running back on the Trashmen's bench. Not being able to play Adams this week is a killer, especially after what he did last week against the 49ers!

Team Dez Nuts is looking for that crucial win that can get them back on track and start to make a push for the playoffs. However, it is not a good week to have JuJu or Lockett on the bye. Dez Nuts traded Gronk for Miller and Yeldon - here is to hoping that Fournette remains out and Yeldon continues to be the starting running back for the Jags. It doesn't matter that Dez Nuts is missing JuJu and Lockett - because this will be a low scoring matchup (both teams might not break 100).

Prediction: Team Dez Nuts wins!!

Col. Erran Morad (1-5) v Hernandez Hit Men (6-0)

Sometimes when you look at a matchup and you see the difference in lineups and teams - there is just not a lot you can say. There is nothing you can do, other than call it like it is - Hernandez Hit Men's team is good! Until HHM loses, they are the team to beat - that time will not be this week. 

Col. Morad will begin to feel the tight squeeze of the playoff push after this week. The fall for D. Thomas happened out of nowhere and Kenum has clear preference for Sanders - which does not bode well for Col. Morad's lineup. Look for Winston to score in the 20's and everyone else struggle to break 10 points!

Prediction: Hernandez Hit Men wins!!

Sagging TD's (1-5) v Hoosier Daddy (3-3)

Sagging TD's is a team that is in desperate need of a win - considering they decided to keep everyone last week instead of drop someone for a tight end replacement. This should not be the lineup that ends up playing on Sunday. Brees, Golladay, and maybe Cook or Godwin could all be placed in the starting lineup this week. Will it be enough?

Gurley is a freak. Evans should have a big week. Those two players alone could win this matchup. They won't have to though, the steady increase in target share for Trey Burton is good sign for this team moving into the back half of the season. Duke Johnson finds himself in a matchup that should involve a lot of points, so hopefully he can get a few big receptions out of the backfield! Once again, Gurley is a freak and Evans should have a big week....

Prediction: Hoosier Daddy wins!!

Mike McCarthy is Gay (0-6) v The J-Bones (2-4)

This matchup was made a little more intriguing by MMIG following the advice of the blog and going out and making a few trades this week - Proud of you, buddy!

The best part about the trades being made? MMIG was able to hold onto Brady and Thielen - his top scorers. With Barber and Gore at running back and Crabtree and Cooks added at wide receiver - this team now has a few possibilities for players to have big weeks. He also has a defense that is playing against the Tennessee offense (which looks awful) and they are in London - bonus points!

The J-Bones will be missing a key piece in their lineup this week, James Conner. However, he was able to trade for and get T. Coleman as a decent replacement. Coleman will likely be the starter in ATL going forward, with Ito Smith getting more of the short yardage/goal line work. This will end up being a close matchup, but the loss of Conner might just be too much to handle...

Prediction: Mike McCarthy is Gay wins!!

Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood (5-1) v UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins (2-4)

Mr. Rodgers finds themselves in a very comfortable spot for the back half of the season. They are one fo the four teams that have a winning record and also have a stud running back with Barkley. Cousins has an easy matchup this week, and Kerryon Johnson looks to be ready to take sole possession of Detroit's backfield. 

Rodgers is on the bye, as well as Cooper - but UrBlogIsWeak has Rivers waiting on the bench, not a bad replacement. Cooper will be replaced by either E. Sanders and that will open the FLEX position for UrBlogIsWeak. It really doesn't matter, unless Elliott goes for 45 points this week - Mr. Rodgers is running away with this! The awkward part about this matchup, both the team owners work in the same room - gonna be an fun week in there!

Prediction: Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood wins!!

Steady Diet (6-0) v Prible is my B*tch (3-3)

Not to spoil the surprise, but the reason why this is the matchup of the week would be because of what I think is going to happen this week.....

QB - Newton v Watson

Both quarterbacks are facing a top tier defense. Both quarterbacks possess the ability to run the ball, but only one quarterback has legitimate downfield threats at wide receiver. I am going to give the slightest of edges to Watson, solely based upon what Prescott was able to do last week against Jacksonville.

RB - Kamara/Mixon v Peterson/Lindsay
Clear cut advantage to Kamara/Mixon. If Peterson or Lindsay want to keep this matchup close, they will need to each find the end zone. Kamara looked like he had lost value in the New Orleans backfield, but I think that might have just been a "Suck it" to the NFL and a welcome back party for Ingram. Mixon looks great in Cincinnati, like the type of running back that you can consistently rely on for three downs.

WR - Hill/Green v Beckham/Jones
I know that Hill has had huge weeks - but he has also had mediocre (at best) weeks. I am predicting two 30 point games from both Beckham and Jones. It is going to be needed. NYG and ATL are playing each other and it could be fun to watch each wide receiver try to outdo the other.

TE - Gronkowski v Engram
This was a HUGE pickup for Steady Diet. SD was able to keep their quartet of RB's and WR's untouched and still managed to add a terrific TE to the squad. The clear advantage here is for Gronkowski. Engram is coming back off of injury, and we don't know what his role in the offense will look like.

FLEX - Ekeler v Boyd
If you have followed football at all you know that Tyler Boyd has been playing like a legitimate WR1 for most teams. In fact, Boyd is actually ranked at WR13. Which is crazy to think that the WR group on PIMB is so good, he has to play the WR13 at FLEX. Clear cut winner - but this is the price Steady Diet paid to get Gronk.

K/DEF - Titans/Bryant v Ravens/Elliott
If I was told I could make one change to PIMB's lineup it would be the defense for this week. I would never want to play a defense that is going against New Orleans after their bye week. Never.

Bryant should see plenty of opportunities to kick the ball this week. Advantage Titans/Bryant

And yes, that brings us to the bold prediction of the week (not actually a thing), but.......

Prediction: Prible is my B*tch wins!!

Mwah

Week 6 Re-insults

Just like in the NFL, our league has formed a top tier. In fact our league is actually beginning to form a separation of talent. As one GM stated early last week...

"Our league has turned into the 'Have' and the 'Have Nots'"

Yes, yes it has. As it stands - there are only four teams that have winning records. ONLY FOUR!!!

Two of those teams stand undefeated and two of those teams only have one loss. Everyone else in the league currently sits at .500 or below. It must not be fun if you are apart of the "Have Nots!" Why don't we talk about a few things those "Have Nots" can do to better their chances...

1. Trade - Seems obvious, but many decide not to explore the trade block. Find a way to turn your stud players into players that can fill your other positions of need.

2. Patience - The same teams cannot win every week. They will lose eventually, it happens every season - more than likely your team has the ability to have big weeks and explode for huge points.

3. Matchups - Many of the teams have multiple fringe players that could have a huge week, but it comes down to reading the matchups. Find the matchups between NFL teams that lack defense, and play those players.

4. Luck - Sometimes there is nothing you can do. You make the right call, but once you make the call it is out of your hands. Exhibit A - Bears Defense against Brock Osweiler scored -1 this week.

5. Pay the Commissioner - Just saying...

Prible is My B*tch (3-3) v White Condomints (5-1)

This was the week for night game comebacks. The matchup score before Sunday Night Football was...

White Condomints - 81.1
Prible is my B*tch - 125.7

That is a deficit of 44.6 points - have no fear... Hunt and Butker are here!! Kareem Hunt had a huge game, 80 yards rushing and 105 yards receiving. Harrison Butker made four field goals and four extra points. After that, this is all she wrote - WC didn't even need Kittle to play on MNF!

Overall, not a bad week for PIMB. If only Jones could catch a few touchdowns here or there. It is amazing how good he is, but yet always fails to snag a touchdown. The "X" factor for this team is Boyd. He gives this team a solid FLEX play, or replacement for bye-week replacements at the wide receiver position.

Result: White Condomints wins...RIGHT!!
Competitor's Prediction: Prible is my B*tch....WRONG!!

Hernandez Hit Men (6-0) v Team Dez Nuts (2-4)

This was a bit surprising, not necessarily the outcome - more the scores. Both teams scored well below their average in points per week... HHM fell short by 17 points and Dez Nuts fell short by 28 points.

Nonetheless, the result is what was a expected - the team to beat comes out on top, many thanks to Melvin Gordon and his explosion of points against a decent run defense in Cleveland. What is more amazing to me, every player (with the exception of Gordon) on HHM was on a losing team - yet somehow his team came out on top???

Dez Nuts can be scratching his head after this one. No points from his kicker and -1 from the Jags defense. JuJu turned in another stellar performance, as well as Luck - solid foundation in a losing effort for what might end up being the worst team in the NFL. If Dez Nut's wants to change his fortunes, he needs a little more out of Gronk and Kelce - or he needs to trade one of them, but which one? And to whom? The world may never know....

Result: Hernandez Hit Men wins....RIGHT!!
Competitor's Prediction: Hernandez Hit Men wins....RIGHT!!

Hoosier Daddy (3-3) v I AM STUPID (3-3)

Well, if you are going to lose - you might as well lose big! Unfortunately (or fortunately) it was not the absolute worst, that honor still remains Coach Morgan and his Aaron Rodgers is GAY squad.

With only one player breaking the 10 point barrier, this was a disaster from the beginning. It didn't help that Michael Thomas was on a bye week. This will not always be the case, it was just a matter of multiple bad weeks coming together and happening at the same time. Honestly, I would prefer this to happen - rather spread out the bad weeks, just have it all happen at once.

On the flip side, Gurley might be a demigod. A literal demigod. He is like Cam Newton playing in a pee-wee football....

Yeah, it is that easy for Gurley. Hoosier Daddy is a dangerous team with Gurley in the line-up, that is one position that he no longer has to worry about - and Gurley scores enough for a few other positions. This is one team that is primed to take-out a top dog, and I am ready to see that matchup!

Result: Hoosier Daddy...RIGHT!!
Competitor's Prediction: I AM STUPID...WRONG!!

The J-Bones (3-3) v The Trashmen (2-4)

Wah-wah-wee-wah - not a good Monday night game for The J-Bones, but only because it was an extremely good game for The Trashmen!!

Going into MNF The Trashmen were down 133.7 to 88.2 - all but written off and done for. Then Davante Adams entered the building...

Adams had a huge game and was complimented by "Good as Gould" to comeback from behind and possibly stage the biggest comeback this season. A real heartache for The J-Bones!

Result: The Trashmen win....WRONG!!
Competitor's Prediction: The Trashmen win.... RIGHT!!

UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins (2-4) v Col. Erran Morad (1-5)

This was a huge week for UrBlogIsWeak - hhhhuuuuugggeee! He can really thank his defense and kicker - who both scored in the 20's - it wouldn't have mattered, but it's like you can give them back and save them for the next week. Also, complimented with good performances from Rodgers and Jeffery and Sanders. This week UrBlogIsWeak scored 5 positions in the 20's - too bad Cooper couldn't join the scoring frenzy, otherwise you might have joined the record book!

Nobody can fault Col. Morad for playing the Bears defense - what in the world happened?!? That won't be the case on a normal week! Winston is a huge addition if he can keep up this type performance. It is very interesting to see what the Chicago Bears are going to do with Jordan Howard - maybe continue to give him the ball in overtime as he continued to rip-off 10-15 yard runs. But hey, why do that when you have Benny Cunningham?

Result: UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins wins...WRONG!!
Competitor's Prediction: Col. Erran Morad...WRONG!!

Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood (5-1) v Sagging TD's (1-5)

This is getting harder and harder to watch. I am really beginning to feel bad for Sagging TD's - like genuinely bad.

On the bright side, he does get to join the Bluffton Bombshell Record books, placing him at the new number four for lowest points scored in a week. It does hurt to say that, because we were doing so well as a league, and then this week we place two new scores in the record book for lowest points scored. It didn't help that Sagging decided not play a TE this week....

THIS IS A WARNING TO ALL LEAGUE MEMBERS - IF YOU PLAY A PLAYER ON A BYE WEEK AND LOSE - YOU WILL FORFEIT YOUR SPOT IN THE LEAGUE!!!

Sagging TD's this is only a warning, don't let it happen again!! Especially considering you have a few players on your bench that you could definitely drop in order to fill a role, not that it would have helped - it is just a bad look.

On the flip side, Mr. Rodgers continues to rack up the victories. It will be interesting to see what happens with Cooper Kupp and his injury. He tried to play, but the tackle looked gruesome and he was carted off - so who knows!

Result: Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood wins....RIGHT!!

Competitor's Prediction: Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood wins....RIGHT!!

Matchup of the Week

Mike McCarthy is GAY (0-6) v Steady Diet (6-0)

Talk about a great matchup!! Let's just break this down...

After the one o'clock games...
MMIG - 102.4 points
Steady - 82.1 points

After the four o'clock games...
MMIG - 110.4 points
Steady - 93.1 points

After the night game....
MMIG - 132.2
Steady - 132.3

Doesn't sound that absurd right?

Well, let's not forget how that game ended - a game winning field goal? Nope, go back one more play. A Tom Brady kneel down. Yup, that is -.1 for Brady...

I CANNOT BELIEVE IT - MMIG LOSES ON A KNEEL DOWN!!!

There comes a point in time when you have to start thinking that this is a season of destiny for Steady Diet. There is always one player that has a huge week and somehow they squeak out the win. Unlucky for MMIG, but what do you do?

Result: Steady Diet wins....RIGHT!!
Competitor's Prediction: Steady Diet wins...RIGHT!!

Overall Record: 23-12
Competitor's Record: 21-14

Week 6 Predator-cations

Soooooooo, the other day, I got lost down a dark tunnel in Youtube. I started clicking on similar videos, and then the next similar videos, and then the next similar video - and so on, and so on. The beauty about finding yourself stuck in a dark tunnel on YouTube? The light at the end. What was my saving grace? Finding a video on how to make a picture look like a pencil drawing in Photoshop. I followed the tutorial and made this beautiful piece of artwork....

Seriously, who doesn't want that hanging in their man cave?!?

Anyways, on to the predictions....

Prible is my B*TCH (3-2) v White Condomints (4-1)

White Condomints always seems to match up against a team with multiple players going on Thursday Night Football games. This week PIMB is using Beckham Jr., Ellison, and Elliot - all of whom play on Thursday.

This matchup is highlighted by the battle between arguably the top two tandem receiving groups - Hopkins/Brown v Jones/Beckham. Jones has a terrific matchup against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and could put up huge numbers. However, I think that the overall success of Hopkins and Brown speaks for itself. If there is not a substantial lead taken after TNF and Beckham playing, then there could be trouble in paradise for PIMB.

Prediction: White Condomints wins!

Hernandez Hit Men (5-0) v Team Dez Nuts (2-3)

This could be the week that the Hernandez Hit Men are tested. Hear me out....
Luck could throw the ball 50+ times again this week.
Lynch could vulture a touchdown, or two.
Thompson could be game scripted into 20+ touches this week.
Lockett could remain as the number one receiver in Seattle.
Smith-Schuster could continued to get his 15+ points a game.
Kelce could explode - thus canceling out Mahomes.
Gronk could feel the need to match Kelce - exploding himself.
Jaguars find themselves in a defensive struggle with Dallas.
Succop doesn't miss any kicks, like every other kicker in the NFL.

See it could happen! But it won't...

Prediction: Hernandez Hit Men

Hoosier Daddy (2-3) v I AM STUPID (3-2)

This will be a nerve racking week for I AM STUPID - without his anchor Michael Thomas. Not to mention, he will have to watch Hoosier Daddy creep closer and closer after nearly every player for I AM STUPID is done after the 1:00 o'clock games and only three players for Hoosier Daddy plays in that time slot. That includes four positions not finishing until after the MNF game!

Let's be fair though, Hoosier Daddy does have the best running back and wide receiver in this matchup. Gurley and Evans should be enough to put this contest out of reach.

Prediction: Hoosier Daddy

The J-Bones (2-3) v Robert 3-Woods (2-3)

It is a battle of the hyphens! Both teams are 2-3 and desperately need a win, nobody wants to fall to 2-4 and face an uphill battle to try and make the playoffs.

Robert 3-Woods record is a skewed result of working with Ryan FitzMagic in the first couple weeks. After his hot streak died out, so did 3-Woods. There are just not a ton of options in the starting line-up for players to score. However, the last time Robert 3-Woods had two or more players competing on TNF he managed to score more 125 points, a feat that The J-Bones have only be able to pull of once. All that being said, Connor is going to have another big week. The two victories for The J-Bones have come when Connor was his leading scorer - look for that trend to continue!

I just want to know if The J-Bones are going to drop Billy Lutz in order to fill that role or if they are going to drop a different bench player in order to keep Lutz for the rest of the season. Is a kicker worth it?

Prediction: The J-Bones

UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins (1-4) v Col. Erran Morad (1-4)

This is a battle between two bottom dwellers. Elliott has performed well for SucItAtkins, but he has not had much support from the other positions. It may not get better for this team either - Col. Morad has four positions coming off of a bye week. That is a huge advantage!

If Winston is able to take advantage of his comfy matchup against the Atlanta Falcons - this should be win number two for Col. Morad.

Prediction: Col. Erran Morad

Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood (4-1) v Sagging TD's (1-4)

This is as lopsided as the Matchup of the Week!

Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood is quickly establishing itself as one the top teams in this league. Saquon Barkley has been a nice anchor for this lineup. White had a huge week against the Indianapolis Colts, and if Jackson, Kupp, or Hilton can each have a decent week - this should be an easy victory for Mr. Rodgers.

Even with the replacements for Brees, Golladay, and Watson - this shouldn't be a match. Although, Crowell does have a nice matchup against the Indianapolis Colts defense, it still won't be enough to keep this close.

Prediction: Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood

Matchup of the Week

Mike McCarthy is Gay (0-5) v Steady Diet (5-0)

This is the Matchup of the Week - and it because it involves two dominate teams. Oh no, it is more because it involves two teams that are on the opposite ends of the spectrum. Who doesn't love picking the upset?

QB: Brady v Newton
Brady matches up against Kansas City and should have to throw the ball to keep up with that powerful offense. Newton is usually good for 50-60 rushing yards, but is that enough to keep this position battle close? I think so, but the edge does go to Brady.

RB: Drake/Coleman v Yeldon/Mixon
Drake has finally put together a decent week and shown what he can do, but Coleman is on a downward spiral with Freeman returning from injury. On the other hand Yeldon is taking over the starting role and Mixon is returning from injury. There is a huge advantage here - and it belongs to Yeldon/Mixon.

WR - Thielen/Hogan v Green/Hill
Let me first say that Thielen is an absolute beast. There is a reason why he is the only receiver to start off a season with five straight 100+ yard receiving games. However, his counterpart (Hogan) probably shouldn't even be on a team, let alone starting at this point in the season.  The combined efforts of Green and Hill is clearly the better choice here. Hill could score a touchdown from anywhere on the field and at the rate that Andy Dalton is playing - AJ Green will return to Pro-Bowl form!

TE - Hooper v Clay
Once again, coin flip - neither player is superb. However, I would give the slightest edge to Hooper because of his matchup and that game should be high scoring.

FLEX - Ridley v Powell
Ridley has stepped up as a second deep threat option for Matt Ryan. Ridley has at least four receptions in the past four weeks. Powell will have a decent game - however, Crowell would be my choice of backs in the New York RBBC. Ridley should win this position battle.

DEF/K - Patriots/McManus v Titans/Bryant
The Patriots matchup against Kansas City - clearly not a good thing.
Bryant is the kicker for a team that will find themselves in a high scoring affair - clearly a good thing.
Advantage, Titans/Bryant

Yeah, I would love to pick the upset - who doesn't love a nice upset?!? But, can we really look at the line-ups and make that pick? I know I can't - stay with the favorite here.

Prediction: Steady Diet


Mwah

Week 5 Results

To be completely fair, I wrote a beginning entry before last night's game. So if you want to jump down to the original entry, jump down to the asterisks. However, last night was a big night....

Let's hear it for Drew Brees. Honestly, I love Peyton Manning. It does suck that it was his record that was broken, but if you had to handpick the quarterback to break any of his records - it would be Drew Brees. 

Brees is an undersized, under-hyped, career derailed by injury quarterback that needs to stand on his tippy-toes to see over his lineman. Yet, somehow he has made the impossible, possible! I am genuinely happy for Drew Brees! Plus, his wife is not too bad on the eyes!

***Well, well, well - how do you think Mason Crosby is feeling right now?

The Green Bay Packers lost by eight points...

Mason Crosby missed four field goals and one extra point. Now, I am no math major - but I think that the 13 points that Crosby cost his team make be able to make up for the eight points GB lost by. Yes, I get it - you can't say that because everything changes in the game. Sure it does, the entire game changes - more than likely Green Bay wins!

However, Crosby did miss four field goals and the Green Bay Packers did lose to the Detroit Lions. But can you blame him? I mean the dude looks like the before picture of a "Just for Men" commercial. Does he use a cane to get to the spot to kick the ball? I wonder if he gets a senior citizen discount at the concession stands at halftime? Do you think he has to be reminded to take his pills in the morning? 

I kid, I kid - to be fair Mason Crosby is only 34 years old. In fact, that is younger than most of my readers... yes I assuming all of your ages! For whatever reason Crosby just happens to have gray hair at a fairly young age. Check-out ole' iron sides himself....

Anyways, enough talking about somebody's grandpa - let's get to the results....

White Condomints (4-1) v Mike McCarthy is Gay (0-5)

Hey, look who is back in the backfield for the New Orleans Saints, I guess those PED's helped him prepare for his big debut!

You know if it was me, and I knew that PED's would make me better - I might take them. Think about it, if you take them and get better faster, then serve a four game suspension - you are at least better and have better chance of earning more money. Hell, Le'Veon Bell is sitting out - why not take PED's instead of holding out for a contract issue, at least this way he could be getting better. Maybe I am wrong, no....wait....I'm never wrong!

White Condomints just barely snuck by MMIG - thanks to the big debut from Mark Ingram. MMIG had a big week from Drake, Brady, Thielen, and Hooper - but it still wasn't enough to get the win. What does this guy gotta do? Hey, MMIG would have beaten seven other opponents - just unlucky it wasn't the one he was playing this week!

Prediction: White Condomints wins....RIGHT!!

Competitor's Prediction: White Condomints....RIGHT!!

Hoosier Daddy (2-3) v Prible is my B**ch (3-2)

Hoosier Daddy has Todd Gurley - who is amazing!! Hoosier Daddy has Russell Wilson - who is great!! Aaaaaannnnndddddd, the list stops there.

Todd Gurley outscored the rest of Hoosier Daddy's team (not including Wilson)! Unfortunately, Hoosier Daddy was not playing his own team - he was playing Prible is my B**ch. PIMB had a huge week from OBJ - who happen to throw and catch a touchdown. Let me first say this....

As cool as it is for running backs or receivers to throw for touchdowns, and it is very cool, it is not necessarily a good thing for fantasy. A passion touchdown is worth less than a receiving or rushing touchdown. Passing yards are worth less than receiving or rushing yards. But hey, the play is cool! OBJ's saving grace was not his passing touchdown, it was his eight receptions for 131 yards and a touchdown. PIMB put together a solid week, but still would not have beaten half of the other teams. Look PIMB to be active on the trading block this week - hoping to improve in the running back position.

Prediction: Prible is my B**ch wins....RIGHT!!

Competitor's Prediction: Prible is my B**ch wins....RIGHT!!

Team Dez Nuts (2-3) v The J-Bones (2-3)

It looks like James Connor has finally awoken from his mini-slumber and exploded in a huge way! 

The J-Bones look like a much different team who James Connor plays like a Steelers running back should play. It also helps that the Bengals defense happen to outscore any one player on Dez Nuts team. This team will be one to watch with Ajayi going on IR and Smallwood looking like the best back in the Eagles backfield at the moment.

Dez Nuts is on a three game slide and needs to find a way to correct the ship. However, to that standpoint Dez Nuts has been in the top half of points scored each week. Dez Nuts has a losing record, but has scored more points than point scored against - tough scheduling for a team with multiple studs in the line-up.

Prediction: Team Dez Nuts wins....WRONG!!

Competitor's Prediction: The J-Bones wins... RIGHT!!

Hernandez Hit Men (5-0) v UrBlogIsWeak SucItAtkins (1-4)

As stated in the predictions for this week, one of these teams is the front runner for "Top Team." There are so many different players that could have great weeks for Hernandez Hit Men - Gordon, McCaffrey, Hyde, Mahomes. Not to mention, that Ebron is looking better and better each passing week. 

UrBlogIsWeak is a struggling team that is currently outside the playoff cut-line. Rivers and Elliott are the only bright spots in this lineup, but if they don't have a huge week this team will struggle to compete. There is no help from any other position. Just follow these instructions.....

Step 1. Light match

Step 2. Drop match into trashcan

Step 3. Drop starting lineup into trashcan

Prediction: Hernandez Hit Men....RIGHT!!

Competitor's Prediction: Hernandez Hit Men....RIGHT!!

Robert 3-Woods (2-3) v Steady Diet (5-0)

Steady Diet still remains one of two teams that are unbeaten, three cheers for them!

Everyone knew this week would come, Kamara has an off week. However, when it happened - Yeldon had a big week! Steady Diet remains unbeaten but he should be thanking his lucky stars that he was playing R3W this week - Steady Diet would have lost to nine other teams this week, but all you can do is beat the team in front you!

R3W needs to fix his lineup - without FitzMagic dominating, this lineup is going to be struggling! Ajayi is on the IR - Hines will be a good replacement, but I am still not sure that will be enough to make a run through the playoffs!

Prediction: Steady Diet wins.... RIGHT!!

Competitor's Prediction: Robert 3-Woods.... WRONG!!

Col. Erran Morad (1-4) v Sagging TD's (1-4)

Who is the world saw this coming?!? In a matchup between two of the worst teams, the most points scored was in this matchup.

It was a very consistent week throughout the entire lineup for Col. Morad. Everyone, with the exception of Jared Cook, performed above average and that it what was needed! On the flip side, let's take a look at a trade that was made for Sagging TD's....

Which side of the trade would you take...

A) 7th best TE, who has scored 57.8 points and is averaging 11.6 points per week

B) 12th best RB, who has scored 78.6 points and is averaging 15.7 points per week

     16th best WR, who has scored 87.8 points and is averaging 17.6 points per week

SOOOOOOO, WHO FLEECED WHO??? WHO HIT ON A WR THAT WAS DRAFTED 109th OVERALL AND IS CURRENTLY RANKED AS THE 41st PLAYER OVERALL??

Nonetheless, even with Crowell rushing for 200+ yards and Brees throwing for three touchdowns - it still was not enough.

Prediction: Sagging TD's wins....WRONG!!

Competitor's Prediction: Sagging TD's wins....WRONG!!

Matchup of the Week

I AM STUPID v Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood

So much for a Matchup of the Week.....

Matt Ryan did win the matchup against Kirk Cousins, even though the Falcons offense looked awful. As predicted.

Barkley/Breida easily won their matchup, even with Breida leaving the game. Huge game for Barkley.

As predicted.

Kupp/Rogers narrowly escaped their matchup against Thomas/Diggs. This was a huge upset in terms of WR matchups.

Not as predicted.

Njoku won his matchup. This was a coin flip - neither one dominates.

WHITE CRUSHED COOKS - easy money.

As predicted.

You would think that with all the "as predicted" in the results post I would have gotten this one correct, however....

Prediction: I AM STUPID wins....WRONG!!

Competitor's Prediction: Mr. Rodger's Neighborhood wins...RIGHT!!

Overall Record: 18-10

Competitor's Record: 17-11

Mwah