Week 12 Predictions

There have officially been 4 "spots" locked up in the league...

Frosted Flaccos/Nips and Salsa/Ertz When Eifert are in the playoffs in some form of another and AR's Finger has been eliminated (which does lock your team - no dropping/waiver wire/trading - you rock with what you got).  Even though ESPN technically gives AR's Finger a 1 percent chance.... 

Yes, I went through all the possibilities and found a way for AR's Finger to make the playoffs... it is possible - it involves them winning out and the perfect breakdown of wins and losses from every team still fighting for a spot. If it happens, Bootay Pirates or Indiana Jones would be the other team. This is like The Avengers when Doctor Strange told Iron man there is only 1 way...

But we essentially, we have a 10 team race for 5 spots - let's break it down....

The J-Bones - favorite to be the next one to clinch a playoff spot... they won without Johnathan Taylor and now he is back in the office and ready to log in some hours. They also welcome back Chris Olave from the bye - which isn't too shabby... we just never know if we can trust the QB situation in New Orleans. One of the good things for The J-Bones is the fact they are currently winning pretty much any tie-breaker... they have actually scored the 3rd most points (as of this writing).

1st Downs Syndrome - if The J-bones done get it done first, you can pretty much count on this squad. They have the 4th most points scored in the league and are not that far behind 3rd place. Drake Maye is the front runner for NFL MVP, CMC is a dawg and if Treveyawn Henderson can do what did last week on a regular - this team is a serious contender.

Project Tush Push - next in line to secure a spot would be Project Tush Push. They have one of the easiest (if not the easiest) remaining schedules. They do not face a single opponent with a winning record... their destiny is in their hands and it is going to come down to the rookies and their performances. This week is a golden opportunity to get magic number 7.

After these 3 teams, that leaves 2 spots up for grabs for 7 teams to fight for. Some teams did what they had to do to stay in the race... but, the following team is on thin ice:

Slender TD's: One of the hardest schedules left of the teams battling for playoff spots. Slender has to be practically perfect - and 2 out of the 3 weeks involve playing a team with a winning record and ending with the current number 1 seeded team (Frosted Flaccos). Slender not only needs to win all three... they also need some help with the other matchups to fall their way in terms of who wins and loses.

We are now down to 6 teams - let's assume that the final seed will somehow squeak in with 6 wins... which leaves all 6 teams able to make it. Here are some interesting things to note for the final stretch...

A) Bootay Pirates and Indiana Jones play each back to back in the final 2 weeks. They are both firmly in the race and both teams have matchups against 3 of the teams that have already clinched their spot. Which means that in order for one of these teams to make it - they may need to sweep each other.

B) 2AP has an incredibly tough final stretch with matchups against 2 top teams in the final two weeks. Now with "Spit Gate" (also the name of last night's escapade) happening a Chase being possibly out this week - things just get that much harder for 2AP - but the rumor is, he likes it hard.

C) ARBL really needs to win this week... after this week they face-off against 2 of the 3 teams that have already locked up their playoff spot. The problem is their bench has been decimated with injuries - currently on their bench is 4 players either out or one the IR. They are able to make a completed lineup, which means anything can happen - but this is essentially a must win week.

D)  That leaves BEKH and Cleveland Streamers, neither one has a great schedule to end. BEKH does have one very winnable week - but both teams have matchups that they will be the underdog. It truly is amazing how open things are for these final spots. If I had to put money on it... I would say 1 team from these make-it... but not both! 

Matchup of the Week

ARBL (5-6) v Cleveland Streamers (4-7)

There are two really enticing matchups... obviously this is one of them. This matchup has a lot on the line for both teams... I predict that the winner of this matchup gets into the playoffs. This is not a spot clinching matchup - I just think it carries that much importance in the grand scheme of how final weeks will go. Let's talk about 2 teams that are carrying no bench: ARBL has 4 players out with injuries and Streamers has 5 empty/bye week spots. Streamers presents more firepower (Jefferson/Tetairoroirioiori/Kittle), but anything can happen. ARBL has tough matchups in terms of players going against tough defenses (New England/Philly/Cleveland). Things are not look good for ARBL, look for Streamers to leap frog them in the standings this week.

Prediction: Cleveland Streamers

Mystery Guest: Cleveland Streamers

Nips and Salsa (9-2) v Indiana Jones (4-7)

This is a big matchup, but different reasons for each team. Nips is fighting for the number 1 seed and regular season champion crown. Indiana Jones is fighting for a playoff spot. You know what, I am just going to say this.... I don't understand ESPN projections. AJ Brown is being projected 16.3 points - he has only surpassed that 2 times this season. There is turmoil between AJ Brown and the offense. I just don't get it. Josh Jacobs is at least out this week for Indiana Jones, so it comes down the Danny Dimes against the KC defense. The Chiefs notably blitz on passing downs and attempt to make the opponent a little more one dimensional. I think that Indianapolis Colts will happily keep handing the ball to Taylor - but that doesn't help Dimes fantasy wise.

Prediction: Nips and Salsa

Mystery Guest: Nips and Salsa

Bootay Pirates (5-6) v Ertz/Eifert (8-3)

Ertz/Eifert is coming off a big loss (one that may have knocked them out of contention for the 1 seed)... maybe they look to get a little revenge. Nothing better than getting a matchup that has you heavily coming after a loss. However, I just don't see that big of a disparity as the projections show. Maybe I am delusional? Or maybe ESPN should hire me, then I can suck my way to the top - to get my own show and I can make fun of sh*tty fantasy manager decisions on live television. Just a few blahhhhhs!! I digress.... I think Ertz/Eiferts wins - but it closer than what it seems ESPN thinks it should be.

Prediction: Ertz/Eifert

Mystery Guest: Bootay Pirates

The J-Bones (7-4) v Frosted Flaccos (9-2)

When we talk about big time matchups... this is one of them. The other possible choice for MotW... we get the 1st seed and top point scorer in the league against the 3rd seed and 3rd highest point scorer in the league. This matchup doesn't have a lot of effect on the playoff cut-off portion of the league - but it does carry some weight for the seeding game. This is also a battle between 2 of the top tier RBs in the league... JT v Bijan. Whichever RB wins that matchup will win their team the matchup... who has the better stallion?

Prediction: Frosted Flaccos

Mystery Guest: The J-Bones

2AP (4-7) v Slender TD (3-8)

I don't know if Slender paid someone in the Bengals organization to squeal about the "Spit Gate" - but it has shifted the tide for this matchup. To be honest, I would not mind seeing a team with Mahomes/King Henry/Puka be knocked out of the playoff push - but I just don't see it happening this week. Chase is suspended for this week, Waddle is on the bye.... it is essentially Josh Allen versus Slender - he likes those odds. At his point, let's see how much more wild sh*t Josh Allen can pull in his backyard session of football. It is like Josh Allen just decided to start a Youtube channel and film him and his buddies playing backyard football and they are going to try and just mess around and chuck it downfield..... only he is doing that in the NFL. 

Prediction: Slender TDs

Mystery Guest: Slender TDs

1st Downs Syndrome (7-4) v BEKH (4-7) 

This matchup pretty boils down to 2 things...

A) De'Vone Achan is on the bye

B) Christian McCaffrey is not on the bye

Any questions?

Prediction: 1st Downs Syndrome

Mystery Guest: 1st Downs Syndrome

Project Tush Push (6-5) v AR's Finger (2-9)

You want to know what makes things even more complicated for this whole playoff push? If Jackson Dart comes back and plays up to his standards, there is a good chance that AR's Finger wins this week. Let's just play that game out for him... in order to stay alive after this week he would need this scenario...

Winners:

Indiana Jones

Cleveland Streamers

Bootay Pirates

Slender TD's

1st Downs Syndrome

AR's finger

If any other combo hits that is these 6 teams winning... no bueno. Soooo, just to keep things interesting I am going with AR's Finger!

Prediction: AR's Finger

Mystery Guest: AR's Finger

As always, good luck to everyone - except for you Indiana Jones - may your entire roster be stuck in a never ending loop of teaching a blind kid how to ride a bike.

With Love

Commish