The NFL Trade Deadline has come and gone and there were some moves - but nothing incredibly crazy. The biggest trade that directly effects fantasy value would involve Kirk Cousins....
The Vikings acquire a much needed upgrade at QB, which was something that generational defense is extremely thankful for after last week's performance of a combined 139 yards and 2 interceptions. The Vikings also managed to be on offense for only 17 minutes... how can you score anything when you are turning the ball over and losing the possession battle at a ratio of 3 to 1. But now, Cousins brings a veteran with composure. If Cousins can average 260 yards/2.5 touchdowns per game with Tre Tucker as his top wide receiver, what will he do when he has Jefferson and Addison to throw the ball to?
I liken the Vikings to our good friend, Ankle Holster. He's got the generational brain talent... boy being teaching math to dumb dumbs. When you have something like that... you just need to add that one things you are missing. The Vikings add Kirk Cousins to their generational defense and Ankle Holster adds a 19-inch kickstand to his brain talent.
It is just shame we know how Ankle Holster's story ends.... will the Vikings end up the same way? Getting your back blown out by some Indian in a white jacket - talk about nightmare fuel.
Anyways, enough about back getting blown out... Here are the Power Rankings
1. Penias and Ferb (9-0) - Get used to this for the next mofoing 5 weeks
2. Factory of Sadness (5-4) - The lineup has more depth than some of the other teams and has a chance to over the They/Them/Zed division in a fight for the 2 seed
3. My Team Sucks (4-5) - Controversial take to put them this high... However, in terms of making the playoffs - they might have the easiest schedule remaining
4. Shough Me Jeanty (5-4) - They are fighting for top seed (3rd seed)... but the loss of Puka and few other key players is really killing their vibes right now
5. Ertz/Eifert (5-4) - They won't be happy about their ranking, but they are beat up and the Lions don't have good matchups for the remainder of the season - do we see a last minute trade deadline move?
6. The J-Bones (5-4) - This has not been how they thought this season would go... but the end goal is still within grasp... get to the playoffs.
7. Check My Chubb (4-5) - A decent lineup that has a legitimate shot to make some noise if they can get into the playoffs - don't tempt them with a good time.
8. Tuten My Horn (5-4) - A team that started off the season 4-1 and was one of the last remaining unbeaten squads is now struggling to find a playoff spot. Javonte and Golden have been huge since the pickup and will need to be
9. Ankle Holster (4-5) - Just think if this team could have kept Jacobs healthy... waiting all this season and had a decent chance of making the playoff only to get kicked in the 19-incher
10. Mounsey Zombies (4-5) - They are here because they won the Luther Burden trade
11. Cleveland Streamers (3-6) - They are here because they lost the Luther Burden trade
12. GOTI (5-4) - Currently, they are actually in the playoffs - but that is because the have the 2nd fewest points scored against - they haven't scored more than 125 points once this year - only one other team can say this.... see number 14
13. AR's Broken Finger (3-6) - This team is officially on my watch list - Jefferson now gets a QB who can presumably throw the ball. In fact, I am saying it right now - I wouldn't be shocked if this team squeaks into the playoffs and beats Penias
14. Nailor? (2-7) - Everyone is fine with injuries, but when you have 3 RB's on IR - it is a doomed situation from the start. It short time... your team will be locked.
And now to the matchups, which are going to look a little different for the write portion of things...
Matchup of the Week
The J-Bones (5-4) v Tuten My Horn (5-4)
This is a big matchup between two 5-4 teams... which is surprisingly the 2nd best record in the league. Something needs to change for Tuten and I am not sure this is the matchup to have that happen. J-Bones were ranked 2nd in the DDA and they started rough... but are slowly making their way back to the top. The wildest part about it all... The J-Bones are the only team in the league to not make a single trade. I like their matchups this week... but I am curious how McBride performs with Beck at QB.
Prediction: The J-Bones
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones
Penias and Ferb 6x* (9-0) v Nailor? (2-7)
I am just to shoot out a quick apology to Nailor... what is about to happen to you is going to be dirty, nasty, unwanted - but you just can't do anything about it. Some call my sex life.... just jokes people.... I would never have sex with Nailor's team.
Prediction: Penias and Ferb
Mystery Guest: Penias and Ferb
Shough Me* (5-4) v Cleveland Streamers (3-6)
Every time a player gets hurt on their lineup, I just imagine this meme...
Prediction: Cleveland Streamers
Mystery Guest: Cleveland Streamers
Ankle Holster (4-5) v Check My Chubb (4-5)
Packers play the Minnesota Vikings.
Vikings defense is currently being compared to the all-time great defenses.
Give me Check My Chubb
Prediction: Check My Chubb
Mystery Guest: Ankle Holster
My Team Sucks (4-5) v Factory of Sadness (5-4)
I am telling you, just look at the lineup of My Team Sucks and tell it isn't surprising they have a losing record. On top of that, there is a slew of comfortable matchups for them. We also can't forget about FoS - the number 2 team in the Power Rankings. Solid lineups throughout - just tough defenses they have to play against this week. I wouldn't be shocked if either team won... but I can almost guarantee you - this matchup could have the most combined points scored.
Prediction: My Team Sucks
Mystery Guest: Factory of Sadness
Mounsey Zombies (4-5) v Ertz/Eifert** (5-4)
I am going to pick Ertz/Eifert, why? Because I am not so sure that Mounsey Zombies is going to be preoccupied with another type of football happening. After we kick the sh*t outta the huskies and Mounsey Zombies comes back and goes on a 48 hour bender... he may forget to set his lineups. Your welcome for the win Ertz/Eifert?
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert
Mystery Guest: Ertz/Eifert
GOTI (5-4) v AR's Finger (3-6)
I am not going to sit here and gas up the possibility of AR's Finger's lineup and not pick them. If there was a lineup from a team that is 3-6 that scares me the most, it might be Mr. Fingers. They have a contender for NFL MVP, 2 starting RB's, and 2 top 10 WR's... not what I would want to play coming down the stretch. On the flip side, if Jadarian Price can return and be what people thought he would be - GOTI has a serious chance to make some impact in the league. Taylor and Price could possibly give them a decent 1-2 punch.... but that is all dependent on if Price can look better than he did prior to the injury.
Prediction: AR's Finger
Mystery Guest: AR's Finger
As always, good luck to everyone - except you, Nailor? - may your entire roster declare to be drafted in the WNBA and forever be stuck in the cycle of women's basketball hell.
With Love
Commish
Week 8 Results
Fantasy Guru: 4-3
Mystery Guest: 6-1
Season Totals
Fantasy Guru: 42-21
Mystery Guest: 34-29
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