I have a list of pictures to view...
And now the aftermath of the injury...
Which one does not fit?
A) Jaxson Dart has knee flex inward - some thought done for season, reports are now saying a MCL sprain with a time frame of 4-6 weeks.... could see him come back around week 9 after the bye week. There is some thought that he returns within the 1-3 week range.
B) Jayden Daniels dislocated his elbow - just when he was cooking up the Cowboys - and is now at best looking at 3-6 weeks. There is no fracture, but he is visiting specialists this week (I gotta guy on the inside). Look for Daniels to return week 8.
C) Caleb Williams had a mosquito land on his hamstring and he went down in agony. He was in tears as he was carted off the field and was even said to have called his mother and discussed retirement. Reports now have him as day-to-day and he is questionable for week 3. F*ck this guy - I feel like I am watching a bad version of Desperate Housewives.
Either way... a few fantasy teams are now scrambling to figure out what to do at QB. Not to mention, Jayden Reed got to the pearly gates of heaven before deciding to try and stay alive during his week 2 injury. Alec Pierce is back where he is feels comfortable - he had 3 injuries last season and now he is well on his way to missing more time than playing. DJ Moore scored owners negative points after leaving early/Saquon is undergoing an MRI today/Jadarian Price is banged up/Rico Dowdle left early/Demarcus Robinson also left early.
New Rankings
1. Penias and Ferb (2-0) NO MOVEMENT: Until further notice - the King will remain at the top. The Daniels injury hurts... but does it? Mahomes (who happens to be the 3rd ranked QB) is smoothly inserted into the starting lineup. You want the top spot? Someone better beat them.
2. Shough Me Jeanty (2-0) UP 2 SPOTS: Is this the best team in the league? They have scored the most points, they are undefeated, they have the largest point differential.
3. Mounsey Zombies (2-0) UP 2 SPOTS: Christian Watson is joining up with the Baltimore Brothers and giving this team a nasty trio of front runners. Not too mention the surprise rebirth of Laporta at the TE spot.
4. Tuten My Horn (2-0) UP 2 SPOTS: The big question for this team is whether CJ Stroud is going to be the answer for a Dart replacement. Honestly, not a bad backup - but he is going to ride and die on whether or not Nico plays - and so will this team.
5. Cleveland Streamers (1-1) UP 3 SPOTS: For some reason, Herbert and LAC offense can't figure it out - if they do? This is a top 3 lineup in the league.
6. Ertz/Eifert (1-1) UP 3 SPOTS: Big belt winner this week! Thank-you Lions tandem, Goff/ARSB - to think that they scored combine 65 points (47% of the teams total points) in a losing effort. You don't need winners in the NFL - you just need point getters.
7. The J-Bones (0-2) DOWN 4 SPOTS: This tumble needs to be studied - to be fair, they had a brutal first 2 weeks... Penias and Shough Me. The lineup looks eye-popping and CMC is staying healthy... give it time?
8. Factory of Sadness (1-1) DOWN 6 SPOTS: This is what happens when there are only 2 games for the sample factor... also, another team that takes a big hit at the QB position
9. Nailor? I Hardly Know Her (1-1) UP 1 SPOT: A team that is close to having a deep lineup... but right now they have 1 stallion. The question is: Rather have 1 stallion or stable full of breeders?
10. A.R's Broken Finger (1-1) UP 1 SPOT: Call it what you want, this team has stud WR's and absolutely big misses everywhere else. Will they wake up and get this team back inside the Playoff Line?
11. Ankle Holster (1-1) DOWN 4 SPOTS: Josh Allen can only do so much - but man is he fun to watch and have on your team. The man is the best player in football - but he is also 1 of 2 players on Holster - when the other doesn't show up, there is not enough depth to survive.
12. My Team Sucks (1-1) UP 1 SPOT: Gotta a big win this past week, thank you Purdy and Aubrey (Tier 1 Kicker). Do you really want to rely on Aubrey to score 16 points each week? Time to make a move.
13. Greatest Offense There Is (0-2) DOWN 1 SPOT: If Ankle Holster is the definition of a 2-man squad... what does that make this team? Stafford and JSN.... and the rest are gearing up to race Johnny Knoxville in The Ringger
14. Slender TD's (0-2) NO MOVEMENT: Yeeaaaahhhhh.... no more passes... you suck at this Fantasy Football thing. Time to make a move or start sucking your own d-piece... the choice is yours.
Things to Note:
- Penias and Shough Me will play in Week 3 for the top spot in the rankings.
- The bottom 3 teams remain the same 3 teams as last week.
- There are 3 teams that faced big-time injuries... Penias/Tuten/Factory - maybe some trade rumors are flying around?
- The biggest mover since the DDA - Mounsey Zombies - thank-you emergence of Christian Watson!!
Week 3 Predictions
Matchup of the Week
Shough Me Jeanty* (2-0) v Penias and Ferb (2-0)
You hate to have the same teams rotate in the MotW.... but what do you do? Not highlight the 1 and 2 in the power rankings? Yeah... everybody in the league knows this is a possible championship preview.
Battle to Watch: Tyler Shough v Patrick Mahomes...
This sounds like a matchup that would be extremely lopsided, and it may - just not the way that you think. Shough, not Mahomes, leads the NFL in passing yards. Shough, not Mahomes, has a disadvantageous backfield and will be forced to the throw the ball often. Shough, not Mahomes, plays for a team that will find themselves in passing scripts more often than not.
Buuuuuutttt.... Mahomes is The Magician.
How Shough wins: Consistency and Break-outs. Fantasy Football is simple when you play for consistency and every so often a breakout happens. Shough Me has the depth to stay consistent, with the exception of a really bad week, they should never drop below 105/110 range. The big breakouts are what pushes the scores up to the 130's and beyond. This is the recipe for success and the depth for this line-up is there.
How Penias wins: Big time players take advantage of comfy matchups. Mahomes gets to go against Miami Dolphins. Jahmyr Gibbs gets to go against New York Jets. Chris Olave gets to go against the Las Vegas Raiders. Matthew Golden gets to go against the Atlanta Falcons. This is a slew of bad defenses... this needs to be a big week for Penias if they want to hold on to the top spot.
Prediction: Penias and Ferb
Mystery Guest: Shough Me Jeanty
Nailor? Hardly (0-2) v Ankle Holster (1-1)
How Nailor? wins: Middle Man never wins. I don't see them winning, but if they did win - it would be with Ankle Holster losing. At this point, Nailor? is stuck in a middle land - they have only a few decent players, but nothing good enough to sustain a good run to the playoffs. Which means they stay stuck and win a few and lose most or they make a trade to gain more depth - but that will cost a top player. Time to get active on the trading block.
How Holster wins: Josh Allen. Is there a better player in the NFL through these 2 weeks? Nope. Is there a better player in fantasy through 2 weeks? Nope. Does somebody need to help him out? Probably. Does Holster need to entertain the idea of a making a move with the other pieces? Probably. Will he? Probably not. Should win this week, thank-you cellar dwellers fighting bottom feeders.
Prediction: Ankle Holster
Mystery Guest: Ankle Holster
Tuten My Horn (2-0) v Slender TD's (0-2)
How Tuten wins: Don't hold your breath for longer than the allotted time that your body can go without oxygen. You could also just not jump off a bridge of 200+ foot valley. Maybe not jump in front of traffic on a eight lane highway? Just put it this way, Slender has yet to break 90 points - they have a combined 159 points through 2 weeks. Just show up, don't shoot yourself in the foot and move on.
How Slender wins: Have you ever heard of the term fire sale? You let the league know that no one is untouchable on your roster. You flood the inbox with a bunch of trade offers. You sift through the offers - you find the best offers you like and piece together a team that is much better than this one. These years are tough (when your team is awful), but they can be the most fun. You have to actually work at trying to make the playoffs - the grind is real.
Prediction: Tuten My Horn
Mystery Guest: Tuten My Horn
My Team Sucks (1-1) v Mounsey Zombies (2-0)
First off, if the top 2 teams in the power rankings weren't playing each other - this would have some discussion to being the MotW.
How Sucks wins: London and Fannin wake up. We are talking about pass catchers who finished 7th in ppg in WR's and 8th in ppg in TE's. Currently, each are averaging 7 - news flash that is a combined 15 points off of what they were doing last year. It is not like they are old enough to regress... wake up and help this squad out!
How Zombies wins: Watson and Laporta have nice matchups.... Watson gets Atlanta on Thursday and Laporta gets NYJ - hello comfy matchups. Not to mention that Lamar and Henry get Dallas - who have given up a total of 347 rushing yards through 2 weeks. I just don't see this matchup going any other way than the Zombies moving to 3-0.
Prediction: Mounsey Zombies
Mystery Guest: Mounsey Zombies
Ertz/Eifert* (1-1) v Cleveland Streamers (1-1)
How Ertz/Eifert wins: Hello BELT WINNER!!! The easy answer is to do what you did last week - which is entirely possible. The more complex answer is to take advantage of matchups that pair well with your big name players. Breece Hall gets Detroit - who has not looked super stellar stopping the opponents rushing attack (giving up nearly 300 yards in 2 weeks). Goff and ARSB then turn around and get the NYJ defense... which is surprisingly good so far? But they have only faced off against the Titans and a battered Packers air attack... nothing compared to Goff and ARSB.
How Streamers wins: Feed the Thirds... Walker has found a system that gives him opportunity and there is little behind him on the depth chart. Cook had a big game last week and is now looking to keep this vaulted Buffalo attack going. The interesting part about feeding the Thirds and is that Burden finds himself on the bench... but that is more because his QB is a puss puss and having Case Keenum be your guy that rely on to get you the ball is never a good thing.
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert
Mystery Guest: Cleveland Streamers
GOTI (0-2) v The J-Bones (0-2)
How GOTI wins: Fire Sale. The Google definition of fire sale is the urgent sale of goods or assets because the owner faces severe financial loss. At some point, you need to make moves and attempt to work this diarrhea into a turd - that or flush this season down the drain with all the sh*t (talking) that follows. But hey, you might just get lucky - you are facing the fastest tumbling team in the Power Rankings.
How JBones wins: Thank the fantasy gods for a matchup that doesn't consist of the top two team in the Power Rankings. Now would be a good time to have the squad show up like the are supposed to and get a much needed win in a big way. Teams that start off 0-3 are 2-22 at making the playoffs in our tightly held manuscripts of the Bluffton Bombshells. A WR needs to help out the lineup... or it might be time to go shopping.
Prediction: The J-Bones
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones
Factory of Sadness (1-1) v A.R's Broken Finger (1-1)
How Factory wins: Hope it doesn't come down to the QB. Obviously, there is nothing that can be done about an injury - but if it were me, I would call that puss puss up and tell him it is time to play. Everywhere else looks like it should be pretty solid - but the big question mark is at QB. There may need to be a long term solution for this problem if Williams does not come back.
How ARs wins: Ceedee Jefferson... See what I did there? See what I did there? These two are two of the top 3 WR's and they need to keep performing like they are in order to keep this teams chances alive. It also wouldn't be a bad thing if Coleston Loveland remembered how to play football again. Loveland was a top 12 TE last season, and a top 10 in the beginning stages of the season. Right now, he is 77th and has score a total of 1.3 points through 2 weeks.
Prediction: ARs Broken Finger
Mystery Guest: Factory of Sadness
As always, good luck to everyone - except you, Shough Me Jeanty - may your entire roster declare to be drafted in the WNBA and forever be stuck in the cycle of women's basketball hell.
With Love
Commish
Week 2 Results
Fantasy Guru: 5-2
Mystery Guest: 3-4
Season Total
Fantasy Guru: 10-4
Mystery Guest: 7-7
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