I am not sure what is crazier... scoring your highest point total as a team and losing (BEKH) or winning with your 2nd lowest point total as a team (ARBL). There must be something in the water with those acronym teams. This was weird week with football in general...
Bills lost to Miami
Jets won their 2nd game
Saints won their 2nd game
Drake Maye is the MVP favorite
Both TNF and MNF games were absolute trash - a combined 34 points, with both games ending at 10-7.
On top of that, we also had some of the biggest performances we have seen in a long time...
Johnathan Taylor - 49.6 points
De'Von Achane - 40.5 points
Jahmyr Gibbs - 38.2 points
After that, it drops down 10 points and we don't have another player that scored over 30 points. This is the fewest number of players to score over 30 points since week 3 - and there were 4 players that scored 29.something.
Weird things are happening in football.... weird things.
Who would have thought that best 2 QB in the league, and top two candidates to win the MVP, would be Drake Maye and Matthew Stafford. Don't get me wrong, they are dawgs.... but nobody saw this coming at the beginning of the season.
Weird things are happening in football.... weird things.
Nobody saw the Jets and the cocaine driven Dolphins winning this week. I don't know what kind of party these teams were at the night before, but sign me up!
Weird things are happening in football.... weird things.
Matchup of the Week
Project Tush Push (6-4) v Frosted Flaccos (8-2)
It is one thing to change your name. It is another thing to change your name a 2nd time. It is another thing to change your name to a player that isn't even playing in the same week. It is another thing to keep doing that and then winning.
Get it the f*ck together Tush Push. Just because the Packer suck doesn't mean your team needs to suck as well. There can only be one sucker... just not enough suckables to go around.
Weird things are happening in football.... weird things.
Prediction: Project Tush Push... WRONG!!
Mystery Guest: Project Tush Push... WRONG!!
Nips and Salsa (8-2) v BEKH (4-6)
Highest point total all season... check
Running back goes off for 40 points.... check
Wide receiver scores 20 points.... check
Opponent sat a defense that scored 20 points and played a defense that score -1.... check
Won the matchup.... NOPE
How is that possible? Achane scored the highest point total in the matchup and the 2nd highest in the league. Nips played the Buccs defense, who score -1 points. Egbuka continued his tear in his campaign for ROTY. And yet, Nips still prevail.
Weird things are happening in football... weird things.
Prediction: Nips and Salsa.... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Nips and Salsa... RIGHT!!
1st Downs Syndrome (6-4) v Cleveland Streamers (3-7)
I am going to be honest, this is the first matchup that made sense. The exact quatro that I thought would win the battle, did win. What doesn't make sense to me is how Kylie Minogue can still rush for a touchdown at the ripe age of 57 and after her singing career.
Weird things are happening in football... weird things.
Prediction: 1st Downs Syndrome.... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: 1st Downs Syndrome... RIGHT!!
The J-Bones (6-4) v Indiana Jones (4-6)
You really don't need for much else when your top scorer nearly grabs himself a Curtis Jackson. I almost never call how things are going to work out in the games correctly... but hot dang did I nail a Berlin chick on this one. It was as if someone within the organization had tipped me off and I just knew.
Now wouldn't it be funny, if some big wig stumbled upon this blog and then they had to do a full investigation into the Indianapolis organization. Just wait... it is going to happen. I will never reveal my source.
Weird things are happening in football... weird things.
Prediction: The J-Bones... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones... RIGHT!!
Bootay Pirates (5-5) v Slender TD's (2-8)
This was a big loss for Slender TD's... especially when you get some decent performances from Puka and Marvin. It did take 20 points from the Seattle defense and Tez Johnson to take down Slender TD's. It is wild to think that Puka is most likely going to be on the outside looking in when it comes to the playoffs. I mean truthfully, I look at Slender's team and I am actually dumbfounded at how they are 2-8.
Mahomes. King Henry. Puka. MHJ. Breece.
Weird things are happening in football... weird things.
Prediction: Slender TD's... WRONG!!
Mystery Guest: Bootay Pirates... RIGHT!!
2AP (3-7) v Ertz/Eifert (8-2)
The rise and fall of Chubba Hubbard is something that not even Enron could mirror. Without Chubba this team is reliant on big time scores and when you remove Chase from the lineup (bye) then you are just removing a big-time playmaker. On the flip side, Stafford is the shock on the league (helps when he is throwing to Puka) and he is playing top-tier football. Dowdle has been a big pickup, but this is almost a team of destiny. Lineup looks shaky.... but they just keep winning.
Weird things are happening in football... weird things.
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Ertz/Eifert.... RIGHT!!
ARBL (5-5) v AR's Finger (2-8)
This is a big win for ARBL... even if it is against a struggling team. When you are 5-5, you give yourself a fighting chance. However, scoring 70 points is not going to be a way to win in future weeks. It will be interesting for these teams to go down the stretch with one team fighting for a spot and one team playing the spoiler. I predict one of these teams will knock out a team in the playoff running. But for this week, there is nothing better than scoring the 2nd lowest point total and still getting the win....
Weird things are happening in football... weird things.
There are a few important numbers that you need to keep in mind for the remainder of the fantasy season
7: The bare minimum number of wins it is going to take to get into the playoffs
122.4: The average point total of winning teams throughout the past 4 weeks
31.4: The average point total of the top scoring player on the winning teams in the past 4 weeks
11282025: Trade Deadline
3: The number of times I plan on winning the belt from her to the end of the regular season
1: The number of times I will have won the league after this season
6,243: The number of words my victory speech will consist of... can't wait to post the video
It is time to strap-in, because these final 5 weeks are about to crazy. There will be a few more trades made, but don't forget... if your team is officially eliminated for the playoffs - you can't trade or drop players. For the record, officially eliminated means that you have a 0% chance to make the playoffs from ESPN. It should also be noted, that it will be highly frowned upon if there are colluding trades made throughout the league. The overall general understanding is that you are trying to win the league with your team. If colluding is discovered, you will have your choice of punishments....
A) Firing Squad
B) 50 Dick Punches
Matchup of the Week
Project Tush Push (6-3) v Frosted Flaccos (7-2)
I will be honest, I almost passed on this matchup for the MotW simply because of the constant team name changes from Frosted Flaccos aka AP2 aka Cocaine Cowboys. Don't we all know how much our beloved biology dislikes change? Not to mention, it is hard for me to keep consistency for Korean readers to track what is happening in the league. This matchup is a big deal for a couple reasons... this is 2 of the top 4 teams in the league and a loss this late in the season will really hurt the chances of securing the top seed in the playoffs. This week I am taking Tush Push for one reason only - a team name change for a player on the bye is just throwing off the feng shui of the team.
Prediction: Project Tush Push
Mystery Guest: Project Tush Push... "Battle of Defiance College. No Flacco? No win!"
Nips and Salsa (7-2) v BEKH (4-5)
At this point (not that it was ever going to be different), there is never going to be a matchup when I don't pick Nips and Salsa. Cards on the table (not the Arizona)... after waiting for players to return from injury - this is the team to beat down the stretch. Can it be done? Sure. It certainly isn't happening this week - I am just sending up prayers for J.J. McCarthy. He is now next in line of the QB injury list that is BEKH's team. Sorry big guy... the Michigan Miracle Man is going down!
Prediction: Nips and Salsa
Mystery Guest: Nips and Salsa... "Nips by a mile. Maybe gearing up to win the whole thing."
1st Downs Syndrome (5-4) v Cleveland Streamers* (3-6)
What a matchup this is!! We got a run heavy lineup (CMC/Irving/Monangai) vs a pass heavy lineup (Jefferson/Ladd/Tetairoa/Kittle). It is interesting, it will probably come down to the role players and whichever team can have someone step-up. Let's assume these all cancel each other out, who are you betting on?
Maye/Odunze/BTJ/Schultz v Goff/Harvey/Mason
If I was a betting man... I would say, give me the PRK 2 QB in the league.
Prediction: 1st Downs Syndrome
Mystery Guest: 1st Downs Syndrome... "Closer than the predicted score"
The J-Bones** (5-4) v Indiana Jones* (4-5)
Is the Johnathan Taylor the best running back in the league? I would say yes... fantasy wise he is currently number 2. That changes after this weekend - he is going to shred the Atlanta defense. Why? The Atlanta secondary is actually, as the kids call it... nice. They are allowing the fewest passing yards per game - so what should the offense do? Hand the ball off to their stallion. Look for Taylor to take over this game, take over the top spot, and take over this matchup. Sorry Danny Dimes... time to hand the reigns over to the thoroughbred you have in the stable.
Prediction: The J-Bones
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones... "Daniel Jones letdown gives The J-Bones the win"
Bootay Pirates (4-5) v Slender TD's** (2-7)
Call it one of the biggest upsets... but I just don't see how Slender TD's loses this matchup. Sure, Patty Mahomes is on bye. Suuuuurrreeee... whoever the hell Chimere Dike is on bye. But with the lineup that can be envisioned - this is a matchup that Slender could win. Not only could they win... but it would also keep them in the game for the chase of the final playoff spot. On the flip side, there is just too much firepower on bye in a crucial week. Missing CeeDee/Kelce/Rice/Ridley is just too much to replace.
Prediction: Slender TD's
Mystery Guest: Bootay Pirates... "Bootay by a mile! Making a push for the playoffs"
2AP (3-6) v Ertz/Eifert** (7-2)
Is there a luckier team in the league? Ertz/Eifert now plays 2AP without Chase, Hubbard has all but lost his job, Warren has to play against the number secondary. If Judkins doesn't play this week - there is chance that 2AP scores less than 90 points. Ertz/Eifert has a good team - arguably one of the top lineups... but it is getting overshadowed by the fortunate schedule they have had. It is similar to when a team like IU enter the CFP - are they really battle tested? Last season IU made the CFP, but had a SOS (Strength of Schedule) in the 90's out of a 130 some D1 teams. Obviously, things did not end well... could it be the same outcome for Ertz/Eifert?
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert
Mystery Guest: Ertz/Eifert... "Let's just say no statue is getting built"
ARBL (4-5) v AR's Finger* (2-7)
Is there a worse feeling that making some moves, having your team get some wins - and then in a crucial week.... half your starting lineup is on the bye. I wish I had something cool to say about this matchup, but when a team doesn't even have enough illegible players to fill lineup on a Wednesday afternoon... it is trouble. This could not come at a better time for Finger - who needs a win to stay in the race. Is this the time for a nice little jumpstart?
Prediction: AR's Finger
Mystery Guest: AR's Finger... "Rare win. Too many people on bye for ARBL"
As always, good luck to everyone - except for you BEKH - may your entire lineup be stuck in a never end loop of teaching a blind kid how to ride a bike.
We are coming down the home stretch of the playoff push - just 5 weeks left of the regular season. For some reason, my mind instantly went to the famed musical "Rent." If you are unfamiliar with the John Larson rock musical classic, you aren't missing out. The musical focuses on musicians who can't pay rent and end up fighting the man. They each have their own super power....
Mark - Super Power: Retard Strength.... there is something to be said about being so dumb, that it eventually works out.
Fantasy Teams
Cocaine Cowboys: Sometimes just putting your trust in a 40 year old QB with a CTE ridden back-up does get the job done
ARBL: Trades away his tops picks and goes on a run of wins
Maureen - Super Power: Plays for both teams (if you know what I mean)... sometimes you just never know if they are leaving with a guy or a doll.... but either way, they are finding a partner.
Fantasy Teams
A.R.'s Finger: They have had 6 different leading scorers
Nips and Salsa: They have had 7 different leading scorers
Mimi - Super Power: HIV... that infectious venom that singlehandedly take down anyone
Fantasy Teams:
Ertz/Eifert: The lowest points scored against by almost 100 points
BEKH: If you are a QB in his starting lineup... you are getting injured, get ready for some much needed elongated rest
Joanne - Super Power: Blind Confidence... she is the acute angle of the Mauren love triangle, she is also a lawyer - who happens to win cases off of luck and circumstance
1st downs Syndrome: Has more points scored against them then they have scored - yet somehow they have a winning record
Project Tush Push: Has currently avoided/will avoid having to play against: CeeDee Lamb, Rashee Rice, Nico Collins, CJ Stroud, Omarion Hampton, Brock Bowers, Lamar Jackson, AJ Brown, Emeka Egbuka, Coleston Loveland (on his big week), Joe Flacco (after his run of top 6 performances), Bo Nix
Benny - Super Power: None... this is the only good guy in the musical - maniacal landlord that just wants his money and then gets screwed (not literally) by a bunch of HIV touting gays
Slender TD's: Scored the 5th most points and still sits 13th place... screw job
Bootay Pirates: Scored the 2nd most points and sits in 7th place... very possible that this team does not make the playoffs
I would like to formally apologize to Cleveland Streamers, The J-Bones, 1st Downs Syndrome, and Indiana Jones for not finding a role in my favorite AIDs rock musical. If you would like I will give you first dibbs to the roles you would like in next month playing of Annie.
Matchup of the Week
Ertz/Eifert** (7-2) v The J-Bones** (5-4)
It is never going to be a good week for The J-Bones if Taylor struggles. If you look at The J-Bones success it is almost entirely dependent upon Taylor and how he does in the week. If Taylor breaks the 25 point barrier - it has happened 5 times, they are 4-1. Taylor didn't break the 25 point barrier this week, which drops their record to a a miserable 1-3 when that doesn't happen. On the flip side, Ertz/Eifert won their 2nd belt of the season and now they join an elite group that has dramatically increased their chances of making it the championship. In the past 5 years the championship has featured at least one team that has multiple belts wins throughout the season. This win not only puts him into a good spot for that stat, but it also moves him up into the middle of the pack with points scored - something a little more respectable than the bottom third.
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones... WRONG!!
AR's Finger* (2-7) v Nips and Salsa (7-2)
Nips and Salsa looked like a pretty tough team to beat, but who would have thought that Brock Bowers would the have biggest week of them all. To follow that up, Lamar Jackson was the 2nd highest scorer on the team... if you are tracking both of those players were picked up through trades. Seem unfair? After the trades, Nips had to wait 4 weeks for them to finally play. We will see if this wait was worth it, this week? Worth it. On the flip side, AR's is almost reaching to point of having their team being shut down when it comes to trading (once eliminated, you can not trade or drop players). I guess - just do what you can to survive... it is now or never!
Prediction: Nips and Salsa... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Nips and Salsa... RIGHT!!
Cleveland Streamers* (3-6) v Bootay Pirates (4-5)
Until you get to the receivers on Cleveland Streamers - the lineup resembles something from the movie Replacements. Jacoby Brissett? (He is playing well, actually very well). RJ Harvey? Playing decently the past 2 weeks - but can not be trusted. Tyjae Spears? This team is leaving off the scrapes of committees outside of the WR/TE position. On the flip side, Bootay Pirates represents a even spread of points - nothing too dominate, but usually a consistent spread. This week they have had 7 different scorers in double digits and on 7 out of the 9 weeks they have had at least 5 scorers in double digits. What can we learn from this? Consistently trust the Booty... don't trust the steam that comes out of it!
Prediction: Bootay Pirates... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Bootay Pirates... RIGHT!!
Slender TD's** (2-7) v 1st Downs Syndrome (5-4)
You know what's a scary thought? 1st Downs Syndrome just scored 130 points with arguably 4 starters on the bye. No bueno for the rest of the league. At this point, CMC is a dawg and things are looking good for him to continue to play with ample opportunity - the 49ers need to keep winning. On the flip side, Slender is glad to have Puka back... but Mahomes and the RB's didn't really do their jobs. In all honesty, this is a weird matchup to look at... I am trying to find where the surprise was that cost Slender the needed win - but even if Mahomes scores 25 points - they still lose. They big surprise Kyle Monangai scoring 22... but is it a surprise? I would trust any RB against the Cincy defense - especially now (just traded their ML).
Pridiction: 1st Downs Syndrome... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: 1st Downs Syndrome... RIGHT!!
BEKH (4-5) v Project Tush Push (6-3)
If you want to talk about a team flying under the radar, it is Project Tush Push. They have not made a trade and are in the bottom half of transactions. They have never won the belt and they are quietly sitting one game back from leading the division. It might be the manager's style... it might be that they were D.D.A. ranked 9th and they have slowly crept-up. This team is the silent killer and you won't know they have in their crosshairs till it is too late. On the flip side, BEKH is just killing off QBs. They started with Joe Burrow, then moved on to Jayden Daniels, then had a sabbatical with Carson Wentz before he died, then returned to Jarden Daniels to finish the job. I am sorry Michigan fans, J.J. McCarthy is next!
Prediction: BEKH... WRONG!!
Mystery Guest: Project Tush Push... RIGHT!!
Indiana Jones* (4-5) v ARBL (4-5)
Both of these teams have found ways to win their matchups in the recent weeks... ARBL was in the top half of the league scoring 1 time in the past 4 weeks and went 3-1. Indiana Jones started just 2 players that also started for this team in week 1. When we talk about trying to make something with your teams... these guys are doing it - now they both sit below .500... but they are putting in the effort to try and get the job done. Can't knock the effort!
Prediction: Indiana Jones... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Indiana Jones... RIGHT!!
Cocaine Cowboys (7-2) v 2AP (3-6)
I am not entirely sure who HIM is... but I am pretty sure Joe Flacco is pretty frickin' close. Since being acquired by the Bengals - Flacco is averaging 24.94 points a week. That makes him the number 1 QB based on average points per week. Also, who the hell plays Tory Horton? Where are your getting your information? If 2AP had issues at RB before... they are in even bigger trouble now. Hubbard has pretty much lost his starting job and now 2AP is stuck with no one at RB.
We are now hitting the beginning stages of stretching out the league and placing them into their lanes for the final playoff push. We are not fully there... but we are loading the gates. I am not going to lie to you... instantly my brain thought of analogy of a woman dilating during birth and I was going to go into graphic detail for you. Maybe even through up some diagrams, put together an interactive presentation that allows to be like the Magic School Bus and fly into the cave of wonders. Then, for some reason - some feeling I have never felt before - a filter kicked it and said, "Nah, don't do that."
Is this what all of you responsible people feel like every day? I am going to be honest, this sucks. I would much rather just continue saying what I want, when I want. Filters are for pussies.
Cigarettes? I light the filter side and smoke out of the back.
Vacuums? Remove filter and you suck up anything roughly 3-7 inches.
Face masks? Just ask 2AP what our opinions on face masks are.
I might even start a new movement - the anti-filter group. However, I would be clever and make two words, but I would switch the first letter of each word that way it would be like a joke. You know something similar to "Joe Blob" or "Pobody's Nerfect." I would call my movement, "Fuck Filters."
See, hard to read with the first letters switched.
Matchup of the Week Ertz/Eifert* (6-2) v The J-Bones (5-3)
The J-Bones are quickly becoming the team to beat in this league and major part of that is Johnathan Taylor. The even crazier part, Omarion Hampton is on the IR and will probably return around playoff time - which only makes this team stronger. However, Ertz/Eifert has ARSB that returns to the lineup. So the real question is: Who do you put your money on? Johnathan Taylor or Amon-Ra St. Brown. I would bet the house on Taylor. But this week, is not my choice. This week I will be leaving it to Mr. Washington....
Head will always be the home team on ESPN and tails will be the visiting team.
Looks like I am rocking with Ertz/Eifert!
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones... "Good match up, more fire power"
AR's Finger* (2-6) v Nips and Salsa (6-2)
There is no hiding it, the Nips and Salsa have put together a juggernaut of a team. Now, if the players can return from health and actually perform the way they are expected to - this is the scariest team out there. Here is what their starting lineup will look like after this week (Barkley comes back from the bye)
Lamar Jackson - 2nd QB drafted
Jahmyr Gibbs - 3rd RB drafted
Saquon Barkley - 2nd RB drafted
Smith-Njigba - 2nd current scoring WR
Cooper Kupp - Only weak spot in the lineup
Brock Bowers - 1st drafted TE
Kyren Williams - 13th ranked RB
Buccaneers DEF - 4th ranked DEF
Who cares about kicking?
Stupid good and you know what.... ARBL has won 3 out of the last 4 matchups and since AR's Finger traded Brock Bowers - he hasn't played a snap of football. Is the wait going to be worth it? Who knows, but this week I am taking....
Nips and Salsa!
Prediction: Nips and Salsa
Mystery Guest: Nips... "Will he lose the rest of the year? Me's don't think so"
Cleveland Streamers* (3-5) v Bootay Pirates (3-5)
This is a crucial week for both of these teams. In the most recent past 5 years of the league only one team has made the playoffs with 8 losses. Which means that you pretty much need to finish 7-7 to get into the playoffs. Trust me when I say this, you don't want to pick up your 6th loss this week and have to close with near perfection to get into the playoffs. In fact, teams with 6 losses currently are given an average of 13% to make the playoffs. CeeDee coming back gives this team a little more depth, but Streamers holds more firepower in the pass catching department. Honestly, I am okay with either or when it comes to the coinflip - this could be a good matchup!
It looks like it is Bootay Pirates!
Prediction: Bootay Pirates
Mystery Guest: Bootay Pirates... "This team is on a roll. LET'S GO!!"
Slender TD's** (2-6) v 1st Downs Syndrome (4-4)
There truly is nothing better than welcoming back the 1st half MVP to your starting lineup. Puka gets a beautiful welcome back gift, New Orleans Saints. He should have a huge week and will need to for Slender TD's to correct the ship and start moving in the right direction. On the flip side, Downs Syndrome is just hoping that CMC is back to normal and doesn't completely start sucking week-in and week-out. I like my chance with 1st Downs Syndrome, but I would not be upset should the coin select otherwise...
1st Downs Syndrome it is...
Prediction: 1st Downs Syndrome
Mystery Guest: 1st Downs Syndrome... "Easy win for the big fella"
BEKH (4-4) v Project Tush Push (5-3)
For Tush Push, losing Skattebo was a big loss - but that does mean that Singletary gets a little bit of boost. Is it worth the trade-off? Definitely not. It also doesn't help that Achane is on the other side and he is one of the big 3 RB's in the league. Achane is averaging 20 points per week and it is not like Baltimore's defense has done much to stop any type of offense this season. The bigger question is who else is going to step it up for BEKH? Jake Ferguson? Maybe, he is the number 1 TE.... but we all know he really isn't and the actual number 1 TE is on the other side... Tucker Kraft. Anyways, this is where my heart lies...
Looks like I am rocking with BEKH...
Prediction: BEKH
Mystery Guest: Project Tush Push... "Tough match up, going to be close"
Indiana Jones* (3-5) v ARBL (4-4)
Both of these teams have been very active on the trade markets... between both teams there are 4 players that were drafted (not including defense or kickers). Moves were made and now these teams are fighting for their lives. Some think it is admirable, some think it is stupid... one thing is for sure - they are both at least trying to win. That is the only requirement in this league.... effort to win with your team. Some may view your moves as a bad move or a bad trade... but as long as you are genuinely trying to win with your team, that is all that is asked! On to the coin flip....
Although, that coin flip may have been more like a certain banquet reader - I will stay true to the flip...
Prediction: Indiana Jones
Mystery Guest: Indiana Jones... "Who's going to lose with Daniel Jones?"
AP #2 aka Cocaine Cowboys (6-2) v #2 AP (3-5)
I am just going to say it... the name change is intriguing. Not only do these teams now have similar names, but they are also the only two teams that rock a double TE lineup. Yup, that is all I got. Full transparency, I was just picking my teeth with a tooth flosser and popped out a filling. On top of that, about a year ago my wife flipped out on our dentist (at the time) and told them to remove us from their books forever - so now we don't have a dentist. Fun times going to my mind right now, good thing it all comes down to the coin flip!
Looks like it is #2 AP for the flip!
Prediction: #2 AP
Mystery Guest: AP 2.... "Coach's only win this weekend comes on Friday night"
As always, good luck to everyone - except for you AR's Finger - may your entire lineup be stuck in a never ending loop of teaching a blind kid how to ride a bike.
Don't worry, things will get back to normal... you will get your weekly readings of the blog for the fantasy league. I can be on vacation every week - although I believe that is called retirement and who says you can't retire at the age of 38? A few things to note during our Fall Break week....
A) Texas is really nice this time of the year - like wayyyyyyyy better than Indiana. Everything is bigger, weather is warmer, gas is cheaper.
B) Vacation with extended family can really drive a grown man insane. When your niece constantly wants to play and your sister is always complaining about something. Don't worry, at least you have your senile father to have no idea what is going on.
C) Johnathan Taylor is really good at football.... the past 2 weeks: 247 rushing yards/5 touchdowns and that doesn't even include his reception numbers.
D) There are ways to gamble, even when in states that don't allow sports gambling. DraftKings Pick6 is a legal gambling app that can be used in all states.
E) Once fathers hit the age of 65... they lose their ability to hold their pee. 3 stops on the side of the freeway and struggle to get back in the van in the middle of the night and we finally made it back to Indiana.
Matchup of the Week
Bootay Pirates (3-5) v AR's Finger* (2-6)
When you have 4 players score in the 20's and only one of those scored less than 25 points - you have a pretty high chance of winning. To be honest, if Croskey-Merritt would have done anything productive, Bootay Pirates could have had the belt. This is a massive turn around from a team left dead to rights in the early portion of the season. On the flip side, AR's Finger constantly finds themselves with matchups that are not beneficial, giving them the most scored against points in the league. Somebody had to win this and not Bootay Pirates is catapulted into the playoff race.
Prediction: Bootay Pirates.... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Bootay Pirates.... RIGHT!!
Nips and Salsa (6-2) v Cleveland Streamers* (3-5)
Let's be honest, this is Nips and Salsa's JV team and they put up a good fight. Nips had a potential 6 starting lineup players on the bench... that is 6 out of 9 total spots on the bench with a the bye or an injury. Nonetheless, Cleveland needed a win and they pick up a big one. Their pass catchers are coming alive and Kittle has returned at the exact moment they needed him. It is just going to be a guessing game with the running backs - get those right and this could be a dangerous team.
Prediction: Cleveland Streamers... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Cleveland Streamers... RIGHT!!
1st Downs Syndrome (4-4) v Cocaine Cowboys (6-2)
When you don't have your best stuff, just hope you are playing an opponent who also doesn't have their best stuff. Bijan and CMC both score their season low points - neither one breaking 10 points... thankfully they were playing each other. Talking about surprises... Shane Falco and Draco Malfoy are both playing really good football right now. Drake has scored over 20 points in 4 of the last 5 weeks and Flacco is averaging 23 points since being acquired by Cincy. Cocaine is now tied for the top of the league... a tough team that is looking to bolster their playoff position.
Prediction: Cocaine Cowboys... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Cocaine Cowboys... RIGHT!!
Project Tush Push (5-3) v Indiana Jones* (3-5)
There might not be a worse feeling than going into Monday Night Football needing points and you have a WR and the opposing defense left. Every time your WR does well... your defense suffers. Every time your defense does well... your WR is not scoring. Who do you root for? Honestly, it is shocking that Indiana Jones heart didn't just explode with confusion during MNF. Nonetheless... the combo did not work out and they lost.
Prediction: Indiana Jones... WRONG!!
Mystery Guest: Indiana Jones... WRONG!!
ARBL (4-4) v Ertz/Eifert* (6-2)
In a shocking performance (but not really that shocking, when you look at the bye weeks) - Ertz has taken their 2nd loss of the season and now there is a 3-way tie at the top of the league with 2 teams trailing at 5-3. The top is getting more congested and ARBL is attempting to win their back into the playoff race... They are winners of 2 straight and 3 out of the last 4 weeks. Since making the massive trades... they are 3-1 and they have now played their way into the middle of the pack. The question is... can they keep this going when they don't play a team that has the horses on the bye?
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert... WRONG!!
Mystery Guest: Ertz/Eifert... WRONG!!
The J-Bones** (5-3) v Slender TD's** (2-6)
It felt like just the other week, when I gave out the 1st half awards... where was Taylor during that post? Taylor is now the number 1 RB and is averaging 27 points a week. The rushing yardage won't blow you away, but Taylor currently has 14 total touchdowns - nearly 2 touchdowns a week. On the flip side, Slender had Puka (the 1st half MVP) on the bye... this was a cool matchup on paper, with the number of belts, but it was like one fighter stepped into the ring with an arm tied behind his back.
Prediction: The J-Bones... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Slender TDs... WRONG!!
2AP (3-5) v BEKH (4-4)
Let's just say that BEKH didn't have their best stuff today. Egbuka came back down to earth these past couple weeks, he has failed to break 10 points in the past 3 weeks. On the flip side, Chase has loved having Flacco under center - seeing a return to form that made him the number 1 pick. The big question for 2AP is going to be if their running backs can keep up with the WR's when it comes down to the playoff push.
This is going to be a combo post - sorry to all my religious readers... I am on vacation. Some might say, "You have all the time in world." Nahhhhh.... beach and booty is calling my name. Hate me.
Matchup of the Week
Slender TD's** (2-5) v Ertz/Eifert* (6-1)
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Ertz/Eifert... RIGHT!!
Nips and Salsa (6-1) v Tush Push (4-3)
Prediction: Nips and Salsa... WRONG!!
Mystery Guest: Project Tush Push... RIGHT!!
AR's Finger* (2-5) v The J-Bones* (4-3)
Prediction: The J-Bones... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones... RIGHT!!
2AP (2-5) v ARBL (3-4)
Prediction: ARBL... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: 2AP... WRONG!!
Cleveland Streamers* (2-5) v BEKH (4-3)
Prediction: BEKH... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: BEKH... RIGHT!!
Bootay Pirates (2-5) v 1st Downs Syndrome (4-3)
Prediction: 1st Downs Syndrome... WRONG!!
Mystery Guest: 1st Downs Syndrome... WRONG!!
Cocaine Cowboys (5-2) v Indiana Jones* (3-4)
Prediction: Indiana Jones... RIGHT!!
Mystery Guest: Indiana Jones... RIGHT!!
Season: 34-15
Mystery Guest: 25-24
Week 8 Predictions
Matchup of the Week
Bootay Pirates (2-5) v AR's Finger* (2-5)
Prediction: Bootay Pirates
Mystery Guest: Bootay Pirates... "Players have returned to the lineup and the league is his"
Nips and Salsa (6-1) v Cleveland Streamers* (2-5)
Prediction: Cleveland Streamers
Mystery Guest: Cleveland Streamers... "Nips has too many players on bye"
1st Downs Syndrome (4-3) v Cocaine Cowboys (5-2)
Prediction: Cocaine Cowboys
Mystery Guest: Cocaine Cowboys... "Won't be surprised if it is close, both coming off losses"
Project Tush Push (4-3) v Indiana Jones* (3-4)
Prediction: Indiana Jones
Mystery Guest: Indiana Jones... "Jones by a bunch, marriage is a fantasy life"
ARBL (3-4) v Ertz/Eifert* (6-1)
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert
Mystery Guest: Ertz/Eifert... "Better QB makes this a win, close one"
The J-Bones* (4-3) v Slender TD's** (2-5)
Prediction: The J-Bones
Mystery Guest: Slender TD's... "Patty Mahommes is the MVP of the league"
2AP (2-5) v BEKH (4-3)
Prediction: BEKH
Mystery Guest: BEKH... "Can you really win with Carson Wentz as your QB?"
As always, good luck to everyone - except for you Cleveland Streamers - may your entire lineup be stuck in a never ending loop of teaching a blind kid how to ride a bike.
We are at the halfway point in the season, week 7 is the midway point - so let's give some awards!
A) MVP: Puka Nacua, WR (Slender)
This is going to be a very controversial pick - Puka is the 6th overall performing player. However, if we are giving the MVP award for the entirety of the first half of the fantasy season... he is our guy! Bijan Robinson is the highest average points per week player, but he only etches out CMC by .1 points per week. Patty Mahomes is the number QB and has a legitimate case for the MVP award, but average points per week puts him 1 point per week ahead of Jackson. Puka has the separation that is needed, check this out....
He is the number 1 scoring WR
He is the number 1 points per week WR
He has a 10 point lead overall over the the number 2 WR and is scoring an average of 1.6 points more per week.
OHHHHH.... and he scored 4.8 points this week. Which means, he was THAT far ahead prior to this week, that he is still in the lead after the injury. Which means he was clearly dominating that role before this week... in my mind I want separation from anyone else in the same positon.
Let me ask you this... would you rather have Patrick Mahomes or a kicker that is guaranteed to make a field goal from 70 yards away?
The average NFL team get 10 to 12 possessions per game... which means that kicker is worth 30-36 points per game. My point is this... even if you aren't playing the key position for the award - it doesn't mean you aren't considered for the award.
B) Darling of the Draft: Quentin Johnston, WR (BEKH)
Javonte Williams was drafted 93 overall, in the 7th round and the 35th overall RB taken. He is now sitting at 16th overall and 5th RB overall - while averaging over 20 points. Does anyone know the percentage of players drafted after 6th round that average over 20 points? 1.8%
Yeah, this guy is killing right now - not too mention he plays one of the most coveted positions in the league.
Essentially, until the Cowboys are forced into a must pass game script - they are completely content on handing the ball off to Javonte Williams. Williams is averaging 15+ carries a game and 3+ receptions a game. You want to talk about a true workhorse in the first half of the season... you got it.
HOWEVER.... with all that being said. Let me just this - Quentin Johnston was drafted in round 16 and 213th overall. Johnston is currently the 11th best WR... HE WAS DRAFTED AS THE 70TH WR!!! This is the definition of Darling of the Draft. He may have single handedly plummeted Ladd's stock... but there is not a more Darling than someone who was drafted in the very last round and is performing like a true WR1. This just might be the year of the receiver!
C) Trade of the Year: Jayden Daniels/Isiah Pacheco (Downs Syndrome Trading) for TreVeyon Henderson/Brian Thomas Jr (BEKH Trading)
There have been a few trades that have been completed up to this point in the season...
Nips and Salsa Traded: Kyle Pitts/Jameson Williams
C)
Nips and Salsa Traded: Dak Prescott/Courtland Sutton/Brandon Aiyuk
ARBL Traded: Lamar Jackson/Saquon Barkley
D)
Ertz/Eifert Traded: Terry McLaurin/Chig Okonkwo/Chase Brown
ARBL Traded: David Njoku/Rhamondre Stevenson
The last 3 trades in the league(technically the last trade was 2 separate trades) were all completed on the PD Trade-a-Palooza day. Nobody has been busier than ARBL - but hey, at least they are trying to do something to switch it up! You can not knock the hustle!
All of these are fine trades, but the winning Trade of the Year is a trade that both sides saw benefits...
This trade has worked out well for both sides.
1st Downs doesn't need two good QB's and he was leaning towards Drake Maye, who played well when the injury hit Jayden Daniels. He picks up BTJ and the potential that he had - which came to fruition last week. Henderson is what he is... but the big swap Daniels for BTJ.
The flip side of this, BEKH has Jakobi Meyers and Quentin Johnston and they were over performing - which gave them an opportunity to trade BTJ for a needed piece. Here comes Burrow's injury and a need arises... hence the move to pickup Jayden Daniels.
This wins the Trade of the Year for the bene fits on both teams.
D) Waiver Wire Diamond in the Rough: Daniel Jones, QB (Indiana Jones)
Truly, there is one person kicking himself right now - Cleveland Streamers. Oh yes, they drafted him. They then dropped him in week 2 and one week later Ertz/Eifert picks him up. It didn't take long for Chubba to get hurt and Rico to show-out. He has scored over 30 points in the past two weeks... do you think Chubba is getting his job back? Not only has Rico performed well, but the Panthers also won both games. So I ask once again, do you think Chubba will get his job back? Survey says no.
Now, the issue is that Dowdle has only been having his outburst for the past 2 weeks. Is that enough? What about someone who has been doing for more than just 2 weeks? What about someone who is inside the top 10 at his position? What about someone that is an automatic start at the QB position, no matter the match-up?
So if you are tracking, the answer to everyone of those questions is not only "Yes," it is "Yes" from a player that was picked up after week 1. Someone who wasn't thought to be good enough to be drafted (even as a back-up) and now he is starting. Someone who enabled Indiana Jones to never worry about the QB starting position. Clearly, you know who it is because of the name above....
Daniel Jones is responsible for 12 touchdowns (passing and rushing) and has yet to not throw a touchdown in a game. Jones has also alway eclipsed throwing for 200 yards in every game. Jones also provides a sneaky ability to rush... he has 4 rushing touchdowns this year and is averaging 4/5 carries a game.
I know it also should not be considering in the fantasy realm, but Jones is taking his team and making them one the top teams in the NFL. NOBODY SAW THIS COMING!
E) Team to Beat: Nips and Salsa
This might be the least controversial award to give out. Nips is currently undefeated - although that will only last until week 8 (rufffff bye week line-up). There have been hits in the draft and then some risks and obviously a little luck.
Kyren and Gibbs are both inside the top 10 RB's in the league. Dak (although now traded) was a risk that paid-off... he is sitting inside the top 10. JSN is a top 3 WR... another surprise. He was going to have a decent year with the Seahawks trading DK... but nobody expected this kind of a season.
Traded: Dak Prescott/Courtland Sutton/Brandon Aiyuk/Jameson Williams/Kyle Pitts
Some would look as these trades and think, "No wonder you are the team to beat - you fleeced them."
WRONG. Bowers has yet to play, Coleman has yet to make the starting lineup. Jackson was just acquired - also hasn't played in 2 weeks and is currently on a bye week. Barkley was just acquired - but cost a hefty load if Jackson doesn't get better. On paper the trades look heavily in my favor - but in reality... more points have actually left Nips and Salsa than have been returned - a wild thought.
There is no switch-up like the other awards. Why would you switch it up when up to this point a team has been "perfect." If I were to nitpick... they have yet to win the belt and they are going to lose in the coming week or two.... but at this point they are the team to beat.
Matchup of the Week
Slender TD's** (2-4) v Ertz/Eifert* (5-1)
Well, this is a matchup between half of the belts won in the first 6 weeks. Slender is a boom-or-bust team and this week King Henry is on the bye and Puka might be out - this is the time to beat the team. On the flip side, Amon-Ra and Pickens are both projected for more than 20 points. Mayfield is a top 3 QB - this team needs those dawgs to show-up. The recipe for Ertz/Eifert is that it only takes 1.... which seems likely this week. Don't bet against the big 3 - someone should have a big time week. More than likely something will happen for this team to win....
Also, I said in the last blog post that I would be Ertz/Eifert to win.
Prediction: Ertz/Eifert
Mystery Guest: Ertz/Eifert.... Now 6-1, but this matchup is closer than expected
Nips and Salsa (6-0) v Project Tush Push (3-3)
Yes, the Nips and Salsa made a big splash in the trade department over the past couple weeks... but they are going to struggle a little bit over the next 2 weeks. Between having to play Tua this week while waiting for Lamar to come back from his injury. On top of that, Gibbs/Kyren/JSN/Kupp/Bowers are all on the bye next week - trust me when I say this, the undefeated season is coming to an end and soon. On the flip side, Tush Push is coming off of nearly scoring 140 points last week. The rookies are looking good and there is no reason to not pick them to ride high off into the sunset.... no reason other than straight bias!
Prediction: Nips and Salsa
Mystery Guest: Project Tush Push... Big trade by Nips, but it does do him any good this week
AR's Finger* (2-4) v The J-Bones* (3-3)
In case you were wondering, AR hates their team. The J-Bones hate their team (outside of 1 player). This is probably the most self hate fantasy matchup we have this week. When in reality, we have the Darling of the Draft facing off fantasy wise against one the best RB's in the league. Can Williams hold up against Taylor? Smart money would say no.... but Washington is giving up 120 rushing yards per week (and 150 the last 3 weeks). Wait a dick, LAC is actually just behind them in opponent rushing - sooooo smart money is still on Taylor. When it comes down to it, not only is there Taylor - but Nico Collins and Stroud are coming off the bye and have no excuse to not be ready to go.
Prediction: The J-Bones
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones... Solid win. If Swift can have a big day, maybe they win
2AP (2-4) v ARBL (2-4)
Some people are scratching their heads when it comes to the trade that ARBL made this week...
Traded: Lamar Jackson/Saquon Barkley
Received: Dak Prescott/Courtland Sutton/Brandon Aiyuk
Now, first off - this was a back and forth conversation and ARBL sent this trade. The positive for the trade... Dak is the 6th best QB currently and faces a weak Washington defense this week. Sutton is a top 15 receiver and steps into automatically starting. Aiyuk presents huge potential as the most talented receiver in San Fran when he returns to health. On top of that, at a time in need Jackson has not played in 3 weeks and is on the bye this week... Barkley is not even a top 10 RB and is living off of his last season lore.
With all that being said... give me ARBL to beat 2AP and their confusing mixed bag of I don't know what your going to get week in and week out.
Prediction: ARBL
Mystery Guest: 2AP... Does coach beat Blackhawk? Well, he definitely beats ARBL
Cleveland Streamers (2-4) v BEKH (3-3)
Streamers welcomes back George Kittle with open arms. They also welcome back Mason and Jefferson from the bye week last week. Justin Fields returns to the U.S. of A... don't look now, but this is pretty much an entirely different team. Unfortunately, they have to go against one of the more consistent teams in the league. You would have to go back to week 1 to find a week when BEKH didn't score at least 110 points. Now, they have blown anyone away - but they know what they are... odds Streamers let's them off the hook?
Prediction: BEKH
Mystery Guest: BEKH... Impressive win. When Fields is your QB, it's bound to be a disaster
Bootay Pirates (1-5) v 1st Downs Syndrome (4-2)
This is a good matchup that will need to be closely monitored - by their own managers - specifically one of them. Bootay Pirates is more of an "Eff, we ball" kind of manager and rocks with what is out there. Doesn't make a lot of moves... may even preset all the lineups prior to the season starts (who knows). On the flip side, Downs has Mike Evans/Chris Godwin/Buck Buck all carrying a "doubtful" or "questionable" tag. They also have Bourne and Pearsall on their roster - Pearsall has the questionable tag and Bourne would play if Pearsall can not. These will decisions might make or break this matchup - if there was one manager I would trust to follow... it is 1st Downs. Either that, or he just has a thing for receivers in red?
Prediction: 1st Downs Syndrome
Mystery Guest: 1st Downs Syndrome... Bootay may not win again this season if CeeDee doesn't come back
Cocaine Cowboys (5-1) v Indiana Jones (2-4)
If you could fly under the radar and be 5-1 Cocaine Cowboys have just so happen to do that. There is not a lot of chatter about how good this team is/looks.
A) Bijan is the best running back in the NFL - PERIOD.
B) Kamara is the RB2 on this team.... uhhhh, not bad.
C) There truly is not a weak spot on this team when you round out the starting lineup with Goff/DK/DeVonta/McBride/Diggs. All good players that are throwing the ball or could be the desirable number 1 on their team.
D) The Indianapolis Colts have quietly put together a great season and their defense is getting overlooked... but they are a top 5 defense in the league.
That is how you fly under the radar. You know how else you fly under the radar? Indiana Jones keeps you quiet for just 1 week. You stay near the top of the division, still inside the playoff cut and yet no one speaks ill about you. I guess you could thank Indiana Jones for helping keep you under the radar this week.
Prediction: Indiana Jones
Mystery Guest: Indiana Jones... Suprise/Best pickup of the season; wins with the Colts, wins in Fantasy
As always, good luck to everyone - except for you Project Tush Push - may your entire lineup be stuck in a never ending loop of teaching a blind kid how to ride a bike.
