Remember when we didn't have a single trade in the first quarter of the season? Well, that time has come and passed. It looks like Ankle Holster has been busy and why not - if you are the only team that has yet to record a win, you may as well try to switch up the mojo. The big question is determining who is winning the trades....
A) Ankle Holster trades Jared Cook for Robert Tonyan (The J-Bones)
Winner: No one. In all reality this is pretty much a swap of lower level tight ends. Some might say that Cook serves better as consistency and Tonyan has the high the potential for touchdowns - last year having 11 touchdown receptions. There is no clearcut winner here - if there was a gun held to my head I would give the edge to Cook.
B) Ankle Holster trades J. Jacobs/K. Drake/C. Claypool for A. Jones/C. Samuel (Fresh Start)
Winner: Ankle Holster - but it isn't by much. Aaron Jones represents the best player in the trade... but he does have his off nights. There is a trend taking place in all these trades (with Ankle Holster) and yet somehow this trade still makes the sense. Claypool provides a big play WR for Fresh Start - especially with JuJu being sidelined. The issue is going to be trusting Jacobs/Drake especially with the Gruden debacle and the state of the Raiders offense. The edge goes to Aaron Jones - and if Curtis Samuel can stay healthy, this might be a home run for Holster.
C) Ankle Holster trades Tony Pollard for AJ Dillon (DK Country)
Winner: DK Country. Not that is matter that much, but Pollard is a much better backup running back. The Dallas Cowboys have actively used Tony Pollard - and in a pinch he is much better than anything you could pickup off the waiver wire. Once again, there is a reason why Holster is making this trade and is Pollard really going to make a difference for him? Probably not. However, in this trade alone - DK Country gets the better end of the deal.
D) The Fortune Cockies trade Mark Andrews and Michael Pittman for Deandre Hopkins (Church Vans)
Winner: Both. Typically, I would state a winner - with a gun to my head I would say The Fortune Cockies won the trade by acquiring the best player. However, Church Vans acquires depth - they receive two players that will go straight into the starting lineup. The more curious part is that fact that Church Vans already has Travis Kelce... which means that they really value the depth with Pittman and Andrews. To be fair, Andrews will continue to see a large target volume and Pittman is the number one receiver in Indianapolis. Hopkins represents the best player in the trade and an arguably top 3 receiver by season's end - let's hope The Fortune Cockies can make it to the post season and see Hopkins live up to his potential.
Matchup of the Week
PEN15 Wrinkle (4-1) v Hernandez Hit Men* (4-1)
Prediction: Hernandez Hit Men
Mystery Guest: Hernandez Hit Men
The Fortune Cockies (4-1) v Ankle Holster (0-5)
Ankle Holster has been extremely active on the trading block - will it matter? Of course not. The Packers play the Chicago Bears and the bigger question is: Will Ankle Holster be able to acquire enough players to have an entire starting lineup of Packers players? It would be poetic justice for Ankle Holster to get their first win, especially against The Fortune Cockies. I just don't see it happening - The Fortune Cockies are too strong of a team, with too many big week possibilities.
Prediction: The Fortune Cockies
Mystery Guest: Ankle Holster
DK Country* (2-3) v Country Roads (4-1)
What we have here is a battle for the word "Country." Who uses the word better in their name? On one side you have DK Country - in reference to DK Metcalf and also the video game Donkey Kong. On the other side you have Country Roads, Take Mahomes - in reference to Patty Mahomes and the late John Denver. To be fair, Country Roads references a player that is not even on their team - and even though I much preferred Diddy Kong Racing to the DK Country game - there is at least a reference to a player on their team. For that reason, I am picking DK Country to win (or the fact that nearly every RB is on bye for Country Roads).
Prediction: DK Country
Mystery Guest: DK Country
Aaron Rodgers Blows Llamas** (3-2) v Church Vans (2-3)
ARBL was a MNF game away from sitting 4-1 and near the top of the league. The lineup is strong and deep - think about this: ARBL has 3 players on the IR, One player is out (soon to be on IR) and still able to throw a lineup of starters out there. Church Vans needs to address his issue at running back otherwise they will be relying heavily on Brady and the pass catchers. HopkinsPittman/Waddle/Kelce/Andrews are going to need to have huuuuge weeks if the RB department is not addressed. Church Vans made a big splash in the trade department - trading away Hopkins but in return receiving two starting players to strengthen their pass catchers. This looks like an attempt to try and win while using a "zero running back" strategy - go all-in on acquiring multiple top notch pass catchers and address the running backs later. Simply because of the now deep lineup and potential for anyone of the wide receivers/tight ends to have big weeks - I gotta go with the new mojo flowing in that Church Van.
Prediction: Church Vans
Mystery Guest: Church Vans
Hoosier Daddy? (3-2) v Teardrop TD's (1-4)
Talk about an unlucky combination of bye week and injuries. Teardrop is facing a tall task when it comes to throwing out a starting lineup, let alone one that can compete. It looks like Teardrop is going to be employing the "Two Tight End" strategy - although to be fair, these are not necessarily the two tight ends you want when it comes to this strategy. At this point, barring any last minute trade, it will be incredibly tough for Teardrop TD's to pull enough together to pull off the upset. It isn't must win yet - but we are getting dangerously close. It doesn't even matter the matchups for Hoosier Daddy.
Prediction: Hoosier Daddy?
Mystery Guest: Hoosier Daddy?
The J-Bones (1-4) v Dixie Normous (1-4)
This is a close battle between two teams that fighting to get out of the bottom of the league. The slightest of edges goes to The J-Bones and the consistency throughout the lineup. There may not be a player that has a huge week - unless Chase decides to catch another 70 yard touchdown. On the flip side, Dixie is coming off a big win and looking to stay hot throughout. The issue will be with replacing Corey Davis (bye week) and Perine (injury). There are options on Dixie's bench - which will be thrown in and make this a close matchup. I still give the edge to The J-Bones and their slew of big play potential wide receivers.
Prediction: The J-Bones
Mystery Guest: The J-Bones
Bluffton Backup Backups (3-2) v Fresh Start* (3-2)
Fresh Start has a big hole that needs filled - a quarterback. As it stands Fresh Start will need to throw Mac Jones in, who is a good field general - but not a great fantasy quarterback. On the flip side, Bluffton Backup Backups has a slew of "questionable" marks on his starting lineup. They will need to be monitored throughout the week and checked as the week progresses.... we know how good BBB is at that. As it stands the edge goes to BBB - depending on how the QB issue is handled and if BBB can keep up with his starting lineup will decide whether or not the advantage is changed. Obviously, that previous statement was written prior to the waiver wire pickups and trades that ensued on Tuesday. Fresh Start has managed to bring the prodigal son home and Bridgewater will be starting at QB. Not to mention the fact that he brought in Jacobs and Claypool to steady up their lineup. I like the moves and I think the edge goes to Fresh Start.
Prediction: Fresh Start
Mystery Guest: Bluffton Backup Backups
As always, I wish everyone good luck - except for you Ankle Holster, may his entire roster burn in a fiery helicopter crash eerily similar to the one that took down Kobe!
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