Answer: PART-AYYYY!!
Many fantasy football scholars will argue that the most important part of the season is the draft. I am one of those scholars that completely..... wait for it.... wait for it..... wait for it..... agree.
The fantasy football draft is the equivalent of college. College is the most important time of schooling in terms of your career choice. You are able to make decisions about your future and take classes that will give the tools necessary to be successful in your career and life. College also is a time where you enjoy some of the "finer" things in life.
Such is the draft...
The draft is the time when you acquire the tools to help you in your fantasy football "life" (season). You make important decisions about your team and it can really make or break you and your fantasy season. The draft is also a time when you enjoy the "finer" things in life.
Now, I am not stating that draft needs to include ALL of the "finer" things in life. In fact, it most definitely should not include all the "finer" things in life. So, in order to help your understanding I am most specifically talking about women - or wives, girlfriends, mothers, etc. The draft is the place where you get together and you talk trash like only fantasy football leaguers can.
No mother, wife, or girlfriend should be present - otherwise, some men will hold back. You most definitely can not hold back!! You need to let everyone know that you are taking the baddest motherf**ker in the league with your 5th pick! Announce that shit to everyone. You need to let the guy to your left know that his pick sucks and he might as well move away to a distant state because you don't want any of his stupidity to rub off on you. With women present, you won't be able to fully divulge into your debauchery.
I can personally say that I would have offended many women with my language used during our draft. When my buddy next to me says that he is going to take a guy and asks if he thinks it is a good idea - I announce it to everyone.
"This moron over here thinks this guy is a good pick - can you believe that? Boy, I am glad I am not you - not sure I would get out of bed in the morning. You friggin' idiot!"
Which does bring up the next issue - you need to have a draft in the presence of everyone. You can have it take place online - but have everyone bring their laptops/devices and get together. Go out and buy a sticker board and when you make your pick - yell at the "stickerb**ch" to go put up your sticker. It just makes everything so much more enjoyable.
If you are the type that is joining this league to do the best possible you could do - stop reading here. You know who you are; you mock draft everyday, you bring cheat sheets to the party - you may even take the time to dress-up as a general manager! This next segment is just not for you...
Make sure there are drinks available during the draft. Someone(s) need to be fully intoxicated by the end of the draft. One of the best parts of our draft party is the aftermath - the Drunk Draft Analysis (DDA). We take our sticker board and we breakdown our teams - we decide who we think has the worst team and who has the best team. Trust me, when a couple inebriated people get together and start arguing - it will get heated.
At our draft party, we had someone drink a beer a round. Given, it was a 14-team league - plenty of time to accomplish the challenge. However, it was a 16 round draft and afterwards he was very vocal about who had the worst team and who had the best team. For some reason, he was convinced he had the best team? Hmmmmmmm, I wonder how that came to be?
Now, go forth and draft wisely
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